OT: Birds Aren't Real

dbCooper

I'm not on "social media", a downside to that is missing some really cool stuff.  For example, I've been totally ignorant of this movement until now.  It gives me faith that "The Kids Are Still Alright"!  Bought a hat and shirt from them to show support.

Found out about them here: https://www.seattletimes.com/business/birds-arent-real-or-are-they-inside-a-gen-z-conspiracy-theory/

Their web site: https://birdsarentreal.com/

Snopes has an article: https://www.snopes.com/articles/381287/birds-arent-real-movement/

JohnInCarolina

I’m not sure whether to laugh or cringe in response to this one.  And yes I appreciate that it’s meant as satire.

RyanStl

Nothing is real

Yno

ColtsFan

Is this why birds land on power lines? To recharge their batteries? 

The Cen-Tex Smoker

I am also off the social media but have 2 kids. I am well-versed in the “birds aren’t real” game. Funny stuff. 

Acn

RyanStl said:

Nothing is real

dbCooper

It's even worse than we thought...

dbCooper

I'm in!  For some reason my background check took extra time.  Keeping out double-agents and other undesirables is of importance. Initial assignment is on food/beverage team for Activist Events.

Botch

dbCooper said:

I'm in!  For some reason my background check took extra time.  

Well, duh.  You jumped out of an airplane and instead of parachuting down to a specific area, you flew to a totally unrelated location.  

JohnInCarolina

dbCooper said:

I'm in!  For some reason my background check took extra time.  Keeping out double-agents and other undesirables is of importance. Initial assignment is on food/beverage team for Activist Events.

Too funny, I thought about this thread just the other day, because there is a recent version of The Daily (new york times) podcast that covered the movement.  Worth checking out.

Ozzie_Isaac

If Birds are not real, then where do our beloved Green Eggs come from?

Eoin

dbCooper said:

I'm in!  For some reason my background check took extra time.  Keeping out double-agents and other undesirables is of importance. Initial assignment is on food/beverage team for Activist Events.

Nice hat.

BikerBob

Big Green Eggs come from Big Green Birds-everybody knows that.

dbCooper

Ozzie_Isaac said:

If Birds are not real, then where do our beloved Green Eggs come from?

The Easter Bunny!

AnothaStolenGenrator

The poop on my windshield seems all too real.

Ozzie_Isaac

AnothaStolenGenrator said:

The poop on my windshield seems all too real.

Windshields are not real.  You cannot even see them.

dbCooper

AnothaStolenGenrator said:

The poop on my windshield seems all too real.

This topic was covered in my training course, let me try to clear it up for you...

"Bird poop was originally thought to be oil discharge from earlier bird drone models. After further research though, this was disproven. Bird poop irregularly falls on vehicles in large amounts. Recent studies show that 87% of Bird Poop in populated areas falls on people’s cars. Why is this? Confidential documents leaked in 2018 revealing that “Bird Poop” is actually a form of liquidated tracking apparatus. If you walk outside and notice some bird poop just “happened” to fall on your car, be aware that you are now being tracked by the United States Government. It is recommended you clean your car exterior regularly to avoid this."

dbCooper

The Movement is getting some ink in the UK media in a serious interview...

https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2022/apr/14/the-lunacy-is-getting-more-intense-how-birds-arent-real-took-on-the-conspiracy-theorists

The Cen-Tex Smoker

The fact you put this in the “poultry” sub is funnier than you are getting credit for. 

mEGG_My_Day

dbCooper said:

I'm in!  For some reason my background check took extra time.  Keeping out double-agents and other undesirables is of importance. Initial assignment is on food/beverage team for Activist Events.

Is the ‘Birds Aren’t Real’ movement trying to steal the rainbow from its current owners?  This could get ugly! 

Legume

mEGG_My_Day said:

dbCooper said:

I'm in!  For some reason my background check took extra time.  Keeping out double-agents and other undesirables is of importance. Initial assignment is on food/beverage team for Activist Events.

Is the ‘Birds Aren’t Real’ movement trying to steal the rainbow from its current owners?  This could get ugly! 

I hate to break it to you, but rainbows aren’t real either.

JohnInCarolina

Legume said:

mEGG_My_Day said:

dbCooper said:

I'm in!  For some reason my background check took extra time.  Keeping out double-agents and other undesirables is of importance. Initial assignment is on food/beverage team for Activist Events.

Is the ‘Birds Aren’t Real’ movement trying to steal the rainbow from its current owners?  This could get ugly! 

I hate to break it to you, but rainbows aren’t real either.

fishlessman

you know when youre really in trouble and they send out the blue heron model.  pretty much stops you in youre tracks......swarm swarm swarm

nolaegghead

fishlessman said:

you know when youre really in trouble and they send out the blue heron model.  pretty much stops you in youre tracks......swarm swarm swarm

There's probably enough saltpeter (potassium nitrate) on that car to supply a small neighborhood war.

Hansm

I think this thread cost me some IQ points .... UFB !!!

RyanStl

fishlessman said:

you know when youre really in trouble and they send out the blue heron model.  pretty much stops you in youre tracks......swarm swarm swarm

I could have done without that

JohnInCarolina

RyanStl said:

fishlessman said:

you know when youre really in trouble and they send out the blue heron model.  pretty much stops you in youre tracks......swarm swarm swarm

I could have done without that

I would like to agree with your comment here, but I don’t want to like it!  

fishlessman

RyanStl said:

fishlessman said:

you know when youre really in trouble and they send out the blue heron model.  pretty much stops you in youre tracks......swarm swarm swarm

I could have done without that

borrowed my brothers truck one day and got hit by a blue heron, trust me, its not so much the mess....its about the smell

Langner91

A Blue Heron, like SINGULAR?

Looks like a siege of Herons!

alaskanassasin

@fishlessman if it makes you feel better I watched a blue heron gracefully land on a high tension power line.