OT: your memorable lessons in life after marriage? Keep it clean…OK? :OT

RRP

Mickey said:

Canugghead said:

Not as long as @RRP and @Mickey? (apology for missing other elders), but longer than most of the kiddos here. Many great tips here, not much left for me to say 

Will be 53 if we stay together till Sept.
 @RRP dose it get easier in numbers 53,54,and 55?

Can’t explain just now, but I wish you and your precious bride 53, 54 and 70+

Foghorn

When you go out to dinner with a large group because you have family visiting... and her brother and her leftover wings and ribs end up in your car... don't team up with her brother to eat her wings and ribs on the drive home and then put the bones into the refrigerator so she can take them to work the next day... to discover that they are just bones when she goes to heat them up for lunch.

I'm not sure how long it takes to get over this.  It has been 24 years and she still won't laugh about it.

Legume

I love this @Foghorn, given the same situation I am confident I would make the same choice.

theyolksonyou

@Foghorn that’s some grade A pro shît right there

Foghorn

Thanks @theyolksonyou.  Her brother and I are a powerful team in the "****' category.

Mark_B_Good

Our best lesson is to let the small things slide ... you know, when you start arguing about which vegetable tastes better ... maybe not worth the argument. 

Well, that is the theory ... I still argue ... because she makes no sense some times. LOL. Next year is the big 2-5 for us.

JohnInCarolina

I’ve enjoyed this thread.

Langner91

JohnInCarolina said:

I’ve enjoyed this thread.

It triggers my PTSD.

lousubcap

ICASIL as well.  Pearls of wisdom abound here especially from the "Y" chromosome side of the deal. 
Some young enterprising member should turn this into a book.  Right title and it will sell. (I'm too old for that adventure.)🥃

Ozzie_Isaac

I have nothing to offer.  I am still going through the experience via bad decision aspect of my wisdom journey.

JohnInCarolina

Ozzie_Isaac said:

I have nothing to offer.  I am still going through the experience via bad decision aspect of my wisdom journey.

lousubcap

Always remember, "Judgment comes from experience, experience comes from poor judgement!" Intentionally spelled both acceptable ways.  

Botch

JohnInCarolina said:

Ozzie_Isaac said:

I have nothing to offer.  I am still going through the experience via bad decision aspect of my wisdom journey.

I haven't purchased a calendar from despair.com since I retired.  In fact, I haven't purchased  any calendar since then.    

shtgunal3

December will be 29 years for us. We got married when we were 18 and had our first child when we were 19. It hasn’t always been easy, especially in the early years, but we have always been there for each other and a lot of the time, each other is all we had. 

theyolksonyou

Foghorn said:

Thanks @theyolksonyou.  Her brother and I are a powerful team in the "****' category.

And she’s pro level grudge holder

Acn

JohnInCarolina said:

Ozzie_Isaac said:

I have nothing to offer.  I am still going through the experience via bad decision aspect of my wisdom journey.

HofstraJet

Keep your eyes wide open before marriage and half shut afterwards. 😉

Figure out who likes to cook and who likes to clean. Split duties accordingly. I love cooking and hate cleaning and, thankfully, my wife is the opposite. 

Foghorn

Oh yeah.  

Don't tell your mother-in-law that she is a "pompous snob". 

Even if your wife agrees with you it will still make the rest of the vacation somewhat tension-filled.  

Just sayin'

TEXASBGE2018

HofstraJet said:

Keep your eyes wide open before marriage and half shut afterwards. 😉

Figure out who likes to cook and who likes to clean. Split duties accordingly. I love cooking and hate cleaning and, thankfully, my wife is the opposite. 

Same here im the cook she's the neat freak.

SaltySam

Foghorn said:

Oh yeah.  

Don't tell your mother-in-law that she is a "pompous snob". 

Even if your wife agrees with you it will still make the rest of the vacation somewhat tension-filled.  

Just sayin'

“somewhat” 

This made me laugh so hard

theyolksonyou

Foghorn said:

Oh yeah.  

Don't tell your mother-in-law that she is a "pompous snob". 

Even if your wife agrees with you it will still make the rest of the vacation somewhat tension-filled.  

Just sayin'

I get it, but a vacation with my in laws is not in the cards. 

theyolksonyou

theyolksonyou said:

Foghorn said:

Oh yeah.  

Don't tell your mother-in-law that she is a "pompous snob". 

Even if your wife agrees with you it will still make the rest of the vacation somewhat tension-filled.  

Just sayin'

I get it, but a vacation with my in laws is not in the cards. 

Actually, for their 50th and my parents 50th we took them to Mexico.  My in laws actually traded rooms with us so we could have “couple time” on the last night.  So there’s that. 

ksmyrl

@foghorn re leftovers...I've done that. 

Stayed Wayyyyyy to late after a golf game once with some buddies and the bartenders who were of the fairer sex. Too late to cook.  Wayyyy tooooo drunk and she knew it. She was pissed. My buddy was driving me home. She said "at least get me a subway on the way home". I did. And proceeded to eat half of it. And gave the other half to my driver...cause it was the right thing to do. I'm still living that one down 20 years later. 

I also agree 100% on the cook and clean. Deal was the day we got engaged she said "you cook I'll clean, forever" . 22 years later it's still working.

I've also enjoyed this thread. 

alaskanassasin

My brother told me a story about his wife and early in their marriage she was a terrible cook.  Almost inedible, but he told her it was the greatest thing he had ever ate, and slowly over time she got better. 

 When I started dating my wife I remember eating cold taquitos soaked in velvetta that was running off the neighboring shells.  Later on we negotiated that I cook and she cleans, I wish I could slipped mowing in on the deal.

lousubcap

Regarding the early days, I always had a handy bottle of Tabasco at the ready.  I told my wife that regardless of the opening taste I could always standardize it with enough sauce.  That was not well received.  Thus the compromise was, only on leftovers.  Yes very small opening portions were invoked at times.  

dmchicago

RE: The cook/clean dynamic, we settled that a few years ago.

When I cook, I clean.
When she cooks, I clean.

She's the clean freak but Ray Charles has better dishwasher loading skills than my wife.

Mark_B_Good

theyolksonyou said:

Foghorn said:

Oh yeah.  

Don't tell your mother-in-law that she is a "pompous snob". 

Even if your wife agrees with you it will still make the rest of the vacation somewhat tension-filled.  

Just sayin'

I get it, but a vacation with my in laws is not in the cards. 

I just trembled uncontrollably at the thought of my in-laws coming on vacation with us. Look my mom-in-law is great, really ... but when we are on vacation, we are getting hammered, eating lunch at 3 pm, dinner at 9 pm ... sleeping till whenever ... and that just doesn't suit the schedule of a 75 year old.

Langner91

dmchicago said:

When I cook, I clean.
When she cooks, I clean.

This is reason #438 why I can only heckle from the audience on this topic.

JohnInCarolina

dmchicago said:

RE: The cook/clean dynamic, we settled that a few years ago.

When I cook, I clean.
When she cooks, I clean.

We have a similar dynamic here except that she cleans when I cook.  But I understand your preference there.

Early on my wife was doing all of the cooking and all of the cleaning.  I think within the first month of our marriage she made it clear that this "deal" wasn't sustainable for her.  And of course it wasn't.  One of many concessions I was happy to make and that has kept us together since.  

Fred19Flintstone

I learned about the fragility and shortness life can be.  Before, I was immature and took people for granted.  Then the first Mrs Flintstone contracted ovarian cancer.  I learned to be grateful and to frequently let my family know I loved them.  After a couple of bouts she passed away after 13 years of marriage.  A few months later, God gave me the gift of love again in the current Mrs. Flintstone.  We’ve been married almost 17 years now, but I never forgot the lesson I learned.  I like to thank God in prayer everyday and show the people in my life that they’re important to me and that I love them.