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Rockwood vs Chuck Norris

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Teefus
Teefus Posts: 1,208
edited February 2018 in EggHead Forum
There were a couple charcoal shootout threads going so I thought I'd lighten things up.

Chuck Norris doesn't need any time to change from white smoke to blue smoke, and he heats up quick. He can cook a steak just by scowling at it.
Michiana, South of the border.
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  • SmokeyPitt
    SmokeyPitt Posts: 10,490
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    @stlcharcoal was bitten by a cobra and after five days of excruciating pain... the cobra died.

    Which came first the chicken or the egg?  I egged the chicken and then I ate his leg. 

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  • YukonRon
    YukonRon Posts: 16,989
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    Chuck Norris sends Valentine's Day Cards to everyone at Rockwood, and he means it, Dammit.
    "Knowledge is Good" - Emil Faber

    XL and MM
    Louisville, Kentucky
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  • lkapigian
    lkapigian Posts: 10,759
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    Chuck Norris needing Charcoal ...ha, food cools itself 
    Visalia, Ca @lkapigian
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  • SciAggie
    SciAggie Posts: 6,481
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    Chuck Norris can boil water on an egg using Rockwood. 
    Coleman, Texas
    Large BGE & Mini Max for the wok. A few old camp Dutch ovens and a wood fired oven. LSG 24” cabinet offset smoker. There are a few paella pans and a Patagonia cross in the barn. A curing chamber for bacterial transformation of meats...
    "Bourbon slushies. Sure you can cook on the BGE without them, but why would you?"
                                                                                                                          YukonRon
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  • lkapigian
    lkapigian Posts: 10,759
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    SciAggie said:
    Chuck Norris can boil water on an egg using Rockwood. 
    Water boils itself thinking about Chuck Norris 
    Visalia, Ca @lkapigian
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  • Woodchunk
    Woodchunk Posts: 911
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    Chuck doesn't sell lump to pay for his cars =)=)
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  • johnnyp
    johnnyp Posts: 3,932
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    Chuck Norris threw a grenade and killed 50 people.  Then it exploded.
    XL & MM BGE, 36" Blackstone - Newport News, VA
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  • lkapigian
    lkapigian Posts: 10,759
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    SciAggie said:
    Chuck Norris can boil water on an egg using Rockwood. 
    Chuck Norris can boil water under water
    Visalia, Ca @lkapigian
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  • tml1230
    tml1230 Posts: 237
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    Great family story!
    Rumor has it that chuck Norris couldn't find a criminal in the Texas state prison system.
    Sarasota Fl. and  Lake Toxaway N.C. (and Novembers on the island of Kauai) (and April in France.... Don't hate on me for that)
    BGE  medium and minimax
    HOW  BOUT THEM GATORS !
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  • blasting
    blasting Posts: 6,262
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    tml1230 said:

    Rumor has it that chuck Norris couldn't find a criminal in the Texas state prison system.

    Gasp...  If you're wondering where the line is, you just crossed it.


    Phoenix 
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  • pgprescott
    pgprescott Posts: 14,544
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    Is Rockwood taking on JUST Chuck Norris or is Ditka helping Chuck?
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  • WeberWho
    WeberWho Posts: 11,025
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    Chuck Norris once choked a Big Green Egg blue!
    "The pig is an amazing animal. You feed a pig an apple and it makes bacon. Let's see Michael Phelps do that" - Jim Gaffigan

    Minnesota
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  • pgprescott
    pgprescott Posts: 14,544
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    WeberWho said:
    Chuck Norris once choked a Big Green Egg blue!
    I heard he just stared at it and it turned blue with fear. 
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  • Hungry Joe
    Hungry Joe Posts: 1,567
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    Chuck Norris can cut through a hot knife with butter.
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  • DoubleEgger
    DoubleEgger Posts: 17,171
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    My money is on Bruce Lee
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  • jeffwit
    jeffwit Posts: 1,348
    edited February 2018
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    DoubleEgger said:
    My money is on Bruce Lee
    Didn’t they fight in a movie once? Chuck lost, but it may not have been Bruce Lee. 

    Edit: 
    https://youtu.be/GzGUr15P7Tk
    Jefferson, GA
    XL BGE, MM, Things to flip meat over and stuff
    Wife, 3 kids, 5 dogs, 4 cats, 12 chickens, 2 goats, 2 pigs. 
    “Honey, we bought a farm.”
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  • Hungry Joe
    Hungry Joe Posts: 1,567
    edited February 2018
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    https://youtu.be/rxUVuZy9__Y 








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  • Tspud1
    Tspud1 Posts: 1,486
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    Who is Chuck Norris?
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  • billt01
    billt01 Posts: 1,528
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    if Chuck was charcoal, he'd be FOGO
    Have:
     XLBGE / Stumps Baby XL / Couple of Stokers (Gen 1 and Gen 3) / Blackstone 36 / Maxey 3x5 water pan hog cooker
    Had:
    LBGE / Lang 60D / Cookshack SM150 / Stumps Stretch / Stumps Baby

    Fat Willies BBQ
    Ola, Ga

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  • NPHuskerFL
    NPHuskerFL Posts: 17,629
    edited February 2018
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    billt01 said:
    if Chuck was charcoal, he'd be FOGO
    So you're saying he's black and foreign :giggle:

    LBGE 2013 & MM 2014
    Die Hard HUSKER & BRONCO FAN
    Flying Low & Slow in "Da Burg" FL
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  • billt01
    billt01 Posts: 1,528
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    NPHuskerFL said:
    billt01 said:
    if Chuck was charcoal, he'd be FOGO
    So you're saying he's black and foreign :giggle:

    No..

    Joe says it best..

    https://youtu.be/2F2i6EQsPZY
    Have:
     XLBGE / Stumps Baby XL / Couple of Stokers (Gen 1 and Gen 3) / Blackstone 36 / Maxey 3x5 water pan hog cooker
    Had:
    LBGE / Lang 60D / Cookshack SM150 / Stumps Stretch / Stumps Baby

    Fat Willies BBQ
    Ola, Ga

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  • NPHuskerFL
    NPHuskerFL Posts: 17,629
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    billt01 said:
    NPHuskerFL said:
    billt01 said:
    if Chuck was charcoal, he'd be FOGO
    So you're saying he's black and foreign :giggle:

    No..

    Joe says it best..

    https://youtu.be/2F2i6EQsPZY
    Chuck is FOGO Macchio? :wink:



    LBGE 2013 & MM 2014
    Die Hard HUSKER & BRONCO FAN
    Flying Low & Slow in "Da Burg" FL
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  • EggMcMic
    EggMcMic Posts: 340
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    Maybe Chuck Norris choking a Big Green Egg was how the Chiminea was invented??
    EggMcMcc
    Central Illinois
    First L BGE July 2016, RecTec, Traeger, Weber, Campchef
    Second BGE, a MMX, February 2017
    Third BGE, another large, May, 2017
    Added another griddle (BassPro) December 2017
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  • Ozzie_Isaac
    Ozzie_Isaac Posts: 19,037
    edited February 2018
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    Chuck Norris looked at a cow and it cooked itself.
    A bison’s level of aggressiveness, both physical and passive, is legendary. - NPS
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  • thetrim
    thetrim Posts: 11,357
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    Sweep the leg!  Chuck Norris would **** slap Cobra Kai!
    =======================================
    XL 6/06, Mini 6/12, L 10/12, Mini #2 12/14 MiniMax 3/16 Large #2 11/20 Legacy from my FIL - RIP
    Tampa Bay, FL
    EIB 6 Oct 95
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  • GrateEggspectations
    GrateEggspectations Posts: 9,261
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    I heard that Chuck Norris once removed a hot plate setter from an Egg with his bare hands. 

    Chuck Norris once experienced flashback on an Egg... the flame recoiled and extinguished, leaving his eyebrows and lashes intact. 

    Chuck Norris doesn’t use a Thermapen; he probes the center of the meat using only his finger. 

    When Chuck Norris wants to sous vide, he simply swirls the water with his pinky finger with enough vigor to bring it to his desired temp immediately. 

    Chuck Norris once opened a Yeti Tundra complete with bear-proof locks. 

    Chuck Norris once had his finger slide under his Shun while chopping. His replacement knife is being shipped as we speak. 

    For Chuck Norris, every Egg features an adjustable rig; he simply bends the grates into submission. 

    When Chuck Norris finished dicing, he noticed his Boos Block was missing; he had chopped it up along with his veggies. 
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  • Ozzie_Isaac
    Ozzie_Isaac Posts: 19,037
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    GrateEggspectations said:
    I heard that Chuck Norris once removed a hot plate setter from an Egg with his bare hands. 

    Chuck Norris once experienced flashback on an Egg... the flame recoiled and extinguished, leaving his eyebrows and lashes intact. 

    Chuck Norris doesn’t use a Thermapen; he probes the center of the meat using only his finger. 

    When Chuck Norris wants to sous vide, he simply swirls the water with his pinky finger with enough vigor to bring it to his desired temp immediately. 

    Chuck Norris once opened a Yeti Tundra complete with bear-proof locks. 

    Chuck Norris once had his finger slide under his Shun while chopping. His replacement knife is being shipped as we speak. 

    For Chuck Norris, every Egg features an adjustable rig; he simply bends the grates into submission. 

    When Chuck Norris finished dicing, he noticed his Boos Block was missing; he had chopped it up along with his veggies. 
    Omg!! Best ones ever.
    A bison’s level of aggressiveness, both physical and passive, is legendary. - NPS
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