JIC's Thanksgiving Tips

I hope this proves helpful to some of you.  Have a great Thanksgiving y'all!

1. If you're cooking a whole bird remember that the dark meat cooks more slowly than the rest.  Adjust accordingly.  

2. Dry brine your turkey.  Even a couple of hours with some salt in the fridge, before you put it on your smoker of choice today, will make a difference. 

3. Don't count on that controller working well today.  Count on it needing a software update.  Be prepared to use the Egg with just the vents.  If you're not planning on using a controller and your turkey cook goes sideways, blame the controller and the software update anyway.  

4. For those of you who cannot be with family this Thanksgiving, please resist the urge to brag.

5. Someone may object to you putting the football game on while everyone is there, but it is a great way to avoid conversation with family members.

6. Remember that today is the day you get to eat your feelings.  Fold them into the stuffing.  Cover them in gravy.   Swallow them whole.

7. On this day, there is no such thing as too many adult beverages or too much of any one in particular.  Remember that gravy is a beverage.  

8.  Belts have an important role.  Remember to wear one.  If you're any good at Thanksgiving, you should be prepared to loosen it.   

9. Some family members may complain they've had too much to eat.  Remind them that this is our national holiday in America, and that gluttony is their patriotic duty.  

10.  Above all, have fun. Remember that Thanksgiving is a time to count your blessings, one by one, as each relative leaves to go home.