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It's time for another joke thread
Comments
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I was at my bank today; there was a short line.
There was just one lady in front of me, an Asian lady who was trying to exchange yen for dollars.
It was obvious she was very irritated . . .
She asked the teller,
"Why it change? Yesterday, I get two hunat dolla fo yen.
Today I only get hunat eighty? Why it change?"
The teller shrugged his shoulders and said, "Fluctuations."
The Asian lady says,"Fluc you white people too!"
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I'm tired of Chuck Norris jokes. If Chuck Norris was so damn tough he'd come here and slam my head on this keyboarvg@$((guiyW36gghghhh gfghur57(
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http://thedailyheadline.com/farm-kid-writes-home-after-joining-the-marines-this-priceless/
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He was in ecstasy, with a huge smile on his face, as his wife moved forwards, then backwards, forward, then backwards again ....... back and forth ..... back and forth ..... in and out ..... in and out.
She could feel the sweat on her forehead and between her breasts, and trickling down the small of her back, she was getting near to the end.
Her heart was pounding ... her face was flushed ... then she moaned, softly at first, then began to groan louder.
Finally, totally exhausted, she let out an almighty scream and shouted,
"OK, OK! I can't park the bloody car! You do it, you SMUG bastard!"
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An Englishman, a Scotsman, an Irishman, a Welshman, a Latvian, a Turk, an Aussie, a German, a Yank, an Egyptian, a Japanese, a Mexican, a Spaniard, a Russian, a Pole, a Lithuanian, a Swede, a Finn, an Israeli, a Romanian, a Bulgarian, a Serb, a Swiss, a Greek, a Malaysian, a Chinese, a Portuguese, a Singaporean, an Italian, a Norwegian, a Libyan, a Muslim, a Hindu, a Buddhist, and an African went to a night club...
The bouncer said: "Sorry I can’t let you in without a Thai. "
“The best way to execute french cooking is to get good and loaded and whack the hell out of a chicken."
- Julia child
Ogden, UT, USA
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So never then?bgebrent said:
I'm Irish, when I give up drinking I might run for office.JohnInCarolina said:Why did God invent alcohol?
To prevent the Irish from ruling the Earth.
Keepin' It Weird in The ATX FBTX -
Even a blind nut occasionally gets a squirrel.
______________________________________________I love lamp.. -
"I've made a note never to piss you two off." - Stike
"The truth is, these are not very bright guys, and things got out of hand." - Deep Throat -
"I've made a note never to piss you two off." - Stike
"The truth is, these are not very bright guys, and things got out of hand." - Deep Throat -
"Social media gives legions of idiots the right to speak when they once only spoke at a bar after a glass of wine, without harming the community [...] but now they have the same right to speak as a Nobel Prize winner. It's the invasion of the idiots."
-Umberto Eco
2 Large
Peachtree Corners, GA -
Actual rigging is unheard of in the US. Influencing, that happens all the time, but never before was a foreign power involved.
______________________________________________I love lamp.. -
Says who. I highly doubt that is true. Maybe not to this extent, but really, never?nolaegghead said:Actual rigging is unheard of in the US. Influencing, that happens all the time, but never before was a foreign power involved.
Btw, the current administration clumsily meddled in the Russian elections in 2012. This is the motivation behind this retaliatory action by the creep known as Putin.
Just another example of foreign policy failure by these two bozos ( Obama / Clinton). Had they been successful, this wouldn't have happened.
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"I've made a note never to piss you two off." - Stike
"The truth is, these are not very bright guys, and things got out of hand." - Deep Throat -
We should call it what it is " unfriendly, non voluntary, truth revelations". We don't want to label this as Russian or hacking. Surely that insults and hurts the feelings of all the Russians that weren't involved. All this bad press will be used to recruit more hackers and spies. Stop it you are inciting more of these actions!nolaegghead said:Actual rigging is unheard of in the US. Influencing, that happens all the time, but never before was a foreign power involved. -
"I've made a note never to piss you two off." - Stike
"The truth is, these are not very bright guys, and things got out of hand." - Deep Throat -
oh. my. god.pgprescott said:
Says who. I highly doubt that is true. Maybe not to this extent, but really, never?nolaegghead said:Actual rigging is unheard of in the US. Influencing, that happens all the time, but never before was a foreign power involved.
Btw, the current administration clumsily meddled in the Russian elections in 2012. This is the motivation behind this retaliatory action by the creep known as Putin.
Just another example of foreign policy failure by these two bozos ( Obama / Clinton). Had they been successful, this wouldn't have happened.
______________________________________________I love lamp.. -
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/2016_United_States_election_interference_by_Russiapgprescott said:
We should call it what it is " unfriendly, non voluntary, truth revelations". We don't want to label this as Russian or hacking. Surely that insults and hurts the feelings of all the Russians that weren't involved. All this bad press will be used to recruit more hackers and spies. Stop it you are inciting more of these actions!nolaegghead said:Actual rigging is unheard of in the US. Influencing, that happens all the time, but never before was a foreign power involved.
I'm constantly amazed by the depth of your willful ignorance. I wish I could say that was refreshing.
______________________________________________I love lamp.. -
"Some folks just take pride in being ignorant."nolaegghead said:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/2016_United_States_election_interference_by_Russiapgprescott said:
We should call it what it is " unfriendly, non voluntary, truth revelations". We don't want to label this as Russian or hacking. Surely that insults and hurts the feelings of all the Russians that weren't involved. All this bad press will be used to recruit more hackers and spies. Stop it you are inciting more of these actions!nolaegghead said:Actual rigging is unheard of in the US. Influencing, that happens all the time, but never before was a foreign power involved.
I'm constantly amazed by the depth of your willful ignorance. I wish I could say that was refreshing."I've made a note never to piss you two off." - Stike
"The truth is, these are not very bright guys, and things got out of hand." - Deep Throat -
North Carolina Unicorn has spoken
LBGE 2013 & MM 2014Die Hard HUSKER & BRONCO FANFlying Low & Slow in "Da Burg" FL -
I am saying that I'm sure others including the Russian government have certainly engaged in similar activity over the last 100 years. Maybe not the same exact thing, but it's extremely naive to believe otherwise.nolaegghead said:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/2016_United_States_election_interference_by_Russiapgprescott said:
We should call it what it is " unfriendly, non voluntary, truth revelations". We don't want to label this as Russian or hacking. Surely that insults and hurts the feelings of all the Russians that weren't involved. All this bad press will be used to recruit more hackers and spies. Stop it you are inciting more of these actions!nolaegghead said:Actual rigging is unheard of in the US. Influencing, that happens all the time, but never before was a foreign power involved.
I'm constantly amazed by the depth of your willful ignorance. I wish I could say that was refreshing.
Are you denying our clumsy attempt to oust Putin in 2012? These guys just fail at everything. If they had been successful, he would have been history. They failed, he retaliated. Simple. You are the ignorant one. O -
Oh boy.______________________________________________I love lamp..
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"I've made a note never to piss you two off." - Stike
"The truth is, these are not very bright guys, and things got out of hand." - Deep Throat -
Wrong guy.JohnInCarolina said:Two Large Eggs, 6 gal Cajun Fryer, and a MiniMax in Charlotte, NC - My New Table
Twitter: @ Bags
Blog: TheJetsFan.com -
What am I ignorant of in this context? It's obvious what happened.JohnInCarolina said:
"Some folks just take pride in being ignorant."nolaegghead said:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/2016_United_States_election_interference_by_Russiapgprescott said:
We should call it what it is " unfriendly, non voluntary, truth revelations". We don't want to label this as Russian or hacking. Surely that insults and hurts the feelings of all the Russians that weren't involved. All this bad press will be used to recruit more hackers and spies. Stop it you are inciting more of these actions!nolaegghead said:Actual rigging is unheard of in the US. Influencing, that happens all the time, but never before was a foreign power involved.
I'm constantly amazed by the depth of your willful ignorance. I wish I could say that was refreshing.
I'm making fun of your ilk with the pansy ass description i.e. " workplace violence". Weak liberals have for years refused to use the term Islamic terrorism. I'm just using the lefts own logic. (Obviously tongue in cheek)
Does it seem stupid now????
It should!! -
Palm to forehead
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"I've made a note never to piss you two off." - Stike
"The truth is, these are not very bright guys, and things got out of hand." - Deep Throat -
"I've made a note never to piss you two off." - Stike
"The truth is, these are not very bright guys, and things got out of hand." - Deep Throat -
Reince Preibus is quite telling.
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Saw that on the news today, and can't comprehend hardly any of them. And, NO state googled "free pr0n" the most?!?JohnInCarolina said:“The best way to execute french cooking is to get good and loaded and whack the hell out of a chicken."
- Julia child
Ogden, UT, USA
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Dirty Grandpa comes the closest I guess. What's that about?Botch said:
Saw that on the news today, and can't comprehend hardly any of them. And, NO state googled "free pr0n" the most?!?JohnInCarolina said:"I've made a note never to piss you two off." - Stike
"The truth is, these are not very bright guys, and things got out of hand." - Deep Throat -
Maybe after January 20th they won't be shouted down.
http://www.realclearinvestigations.com/articles/2016/12/31/skeptical_climate_scientists_coming_in_from_the_cold.html
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Well at least you found the right thread to post that in. LOLSemolinaPilchard said:Maybe after January 20th they won't be shouted down.
http://www.realclearinvestigations.com/articles/2016/12/31/skeptical_climate_scientists_coming_in_from_the_cold.html"I've made a note never to piss you two off." - Stike
"The truth is, these are not very bright guys, and things got out of hand." - Deep Throat -
@JohnInCarolina I am so glad you feel that way. You made my day.
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There are so many problems with that piece I'm not sure where to start. I will say, however, that the death threats Raj and Michael have received are no laughing matter.SemolinaPilchard said:@JohnInCarolina I am so glad you feel that way. You made my day."I've made a note never to piss you two off." - Stike
"The truth is, these are not very bright guys, and things got out of hand." - Deep Throat
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