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YOUR Worst Egg Cook

Mine was yesterday. Stirred the lump, threw in a firestarter, arranged lump around it like I like to (pyromaniac). And headed in to prep chicken expecting the Egg to be at 300F or so when I returned.

Prepped 18 wings and 4 thighs. While watching the game and targeting dinner time. Took chicken out and gauge is PEGGED! No, wait, it can't be or I'd feel the heat. WTF?!? Oh. Left the cap on. Fire's out.

Tried it again and then hurried so much, too hot, etc, while watching game and turned it into a hot burned mess!


  • I nuked a set of ribs - burned to a crisp.
    "A generation of the unteachable is hanging upon us like a necklace of corpses." - George Orwell 

    "I've made a note never to piss you two off." - Stike

    Ruining the forum, one post at a time.  

    Living large in the 919
  • NDGNDG Posts: 2,210
    BRISKET - so difficult!
    Columbus, Ohio
  • RRPRRP Posts: 24,292
    edited January 2014
    Sunday Brunch casserole. Recipe called for a quart of hot water, which made the egg concoction super soupy, but I thought what the's in the recipe. 30 minutes after the casserole should have been done it was still a liquid/ugly mess! I re-read the recipe and the quart of hot water was to warm the dish itself before going on the egg NOT into the dish! Brunch that day was toast and jelly! 
    Re-gasketing America one yard at a time.
  • fishlessmanfishlessman Posts: 28,616
    the absolute worst thing ive ever egged was corned beef ribs, was thinking it would be more like a pastrami on a rib bone, was saltier than a salt lick. only thing ive ever trashed

    fukahwee maine

    you can lead a fish to water but you can not make him drink it
  • calikingcaliking Posts: 16,038
    I never post pics of failed cooks, ergo they never happened!

    #1 LBGE December 2012 • #2 SBGE February  2013 • #3 Mini May 2013
    A happy BGE family in Houston, TX.
  • My first brisket . . .  [-( it was awful. 
    I'm Kristi ~ Live in FL ~ BGE since 2003.
    I write about food & travel on Necessary Indulgences.  
    You can also find me on FacebookInstagram, and Twitter.
  • jls9595jls9595 Posts: 1,530
    Faux cochon de lait recipe that was posted here looked really good. My attempt went very very badly. I don't think I'll try anything fancy like that again for a while, injured my confidence pretty good. :))
    In Manchester, TN
    Vol For Life!
  • BYS1981BYS1981 Posts: 2,533
    Once I put on 2 chicken breast while the charcoal was still sparking, I was using best of the west at the time, and I figured the sparking would stop soon. The sparks never stopped and I had a layer of ash/soot on the chicken, I never put food on while the lump was sparking again.

    We had pizza that night.
  • my first cook.. too anxious and wanted to cook, put the chicken on before the smoke cleared. 

    wife was upset,  I made it up with the next nights cook.

    XL   Walled Lake, MI

  • CanuggheadCanugghead Posts: 8,739
    edited January 2014
    my first attempt at baby back ribs, actually it was my first or second cook on the egg ... kept opening, peeking and poking, pulled 7 or 8 hours later and it was still undercooked (but thought it was overcooked at the time)  :\">
  • cazzycazzy Posts: 9,136
    My pit ran away on me once and I cooked a horrible brisket.  Nothing rendered right and the texture was whack.
    Just a hack that makes some $hitty BBQ....
  • Brisket.  First one was like shoe leather, the second was "Edible" according to my wife.  Have not tried since.
    Simi Valley, California
    LBGE, PBC, Annova, SMOBot
  • gdenbygdenby Posts: 6,239
    1st time I tried pizza, I didn't put enough corn meal on the stone. A portion of the crust stuck to the stone, and as I pulled the pie up, it flopped back onto the stone, spilling almost all of the cheese into the burning lump. The grease erupted and I jumped back, dropping the peel. When I was able to get the dome down, I could see right where there was a gap in the gasket seal, 'cause the flames were shooting thru it.

    No dinner, fried gasket, and ceramics coated w. grease for several burns thereafter.
  • jls9595jls9595 Posts: 1,530
    My first ever cook on the Egg three years ago I tried baby back ribs. I was reading the temp on the dome thermometer but looking at the inside numbers( Celsius) instead of the outside numbers. Needless to say, 250 degrees Celsius is a little too hot to go for almost five hours. I still ate them.
    In Manchester, TN
    Vol For Life!
  • GrannyX4GrannyX4 Posts: 1,482
    My first chicken. Too much smoke. Lessen learned on wood and the egg. Brisket flat went right to the trash.
    Every day is a bonus day and every meal is a banquet in Winter Springs, Fl !
  • MaskedMarvelMaskedMarvel Posts: 2,839
    the absolute worst thing ive ever egged was corned beef ribs, was thinking it would be more like a pastrami on a rib bone, was saltier than a salt lick. only thing ive ever trashed


    I'd like a better look at that bunmei. Your pic makes it look like a black Damascus?
    Large BGE and Medium BGE
    36" Blackstone - Greensboro!

  • busmaniabusmania Posts: 413
    My wife had invited her best friend from college over and the friend decided to invite her family who I had never met before.  They were like "we'll bring the food, you cook it!".  "sweet" I thought, "this will give me a chance to learn my egg"...I had never cooked chicken halves before.  Needless to say, the temp got away from me and those babys got charred!  the family I had never met was stuck to pick off the burnt skin. Whooooops!  I am much better at temp control now.
  • EagleIIIEagleIII Posts: 415
    Beef Ribs....had too many ribs to lay them flat on the grate, so packed them on edge in a rack, which essentially squeezes them together like sardines.  That CAN work if you factor in MORE time since they are all squeezed together.  As you might guess, I did not do that, and of course I had guests for dinner.  Tried to stall, but could not stall long enough.  Finally pulled off ribs that had a nice bark and nice smoky flavor BUT were pretty much rare in the middle - FAIL!
  • boatbumboatbum Posts: 1,273

    My first.

    Country style ribs, wife invited one of our friends over to eat at 5:30.   At 8 I finally pulled some tough 3/4 done ribs off.  They were chewy, would not turn loose of the bone.   Not that great a flavor.   Decided at that point I needed to study this website some.


    Cookin in Texas
  • SmokeyPittSmokeyPitt Posts: 10,490
    boatbum said:

    My first.

    Country style ribs, wife invited one of our friends over to eat at 5:30.   At 8 I finally pulled some tough 3/4 done ribs off.  They were chewy, would not turn loose of the bone.   Not that great a flavor.   Decided at that point I needed to study this website some.


    That was one of my first failures as well.  I kept them on just long enough for all the juice to be driven out, but not long enough for any fat/collagen breakdown :).  

    Which came first the chicken or the egg?  I egged the chicken and then I ate his leg. 

  • JohnMcJohnMc Posts: 76
    My first cook, boneless skinless chicken breasts...shoe leather. Second cook, pizza with attempt at homemade crust...thick and raw in spots, totally cremated in others. I had decided to put it on Craigs List but threw a brisket on it anyway. Brisket was perfect and I was instantly addicted. Only failures since then involved martinis.
  • corey24corey24 Posts: 386
    Steaks for this past New Years....had only had the egg for about a month but had success on everything in that month,......ribs, brisket, chicken, I decided steak for new years.  Had the entire family over and OVERCOOKED them.  Barely could find any pink in them....Still not over it.....

    XL Egg Owner Since Dec 2013 - Louisiana

  • jaydub58jaydub58 Posts: 2,167
    Wings; last Super Bowl.  Got too engrossed in the game, and wound up with an overcooked, extremely chewy mess...........................
    John in the Willamette Valley of Oregon
  • henapplehenapple Posts: 16,025
    My first steak, brisket, pizza and burgers. 3 days in had some serious buyer's remorse. Honestly if it hadn't been for this forum and all the help I'd probably gotten rid of it. @jls9595...try that cochon again. I'd urge everyone with an epic fail to post it, get some feedback, weigh the comments and try again.
    Green egg, dead animal and alcohol. The "Boro".. TN 
  • Mattman3969Mattman3969 Posts: 10,425
    The first chuckie I cooked could have been used for shoe leather, not even good enough for soup. Thanks to the people here that describe that "Buttah" feeling the next one was awesome. Then there was Brunswick stew, I can't even begin to describe the nastiness with that cook.


    2008 -Large BGE. 2013- Small BGE and 2015 - Mini. Henderson, Ky.
  • MickeyMickey Posts: 19,638
    Photobucket Pictures, Images and Photos
    Salado TX & 30A  FL: Egg Family: 2 Large and a very well used Mini, added a Mini Max when they came out (I'm good for now). Plus a couple Pit Boss Pellet Smokers.   

  • smokesniffersmokesniffer Posts: 2,016
    edited January 2014
    My first fail was ribs. It kind of threw us off of ribs for a bit. They were tough and not tasty at all. henapple's comment about posting a fail and getting feedback on how to improve is bang on. We have or will have a fail from time to time, but the people here are great for giving constructive help. Great bunch of people.
    Large, small, and a mini
  • CanuggheadCanugghead Posts: 8,739
    @Mickey, next time go easy on the blackening salt  :D
  • BYS1981BYS1981 Posts: 2,533
    Mickey said:

    Photobucket Pictures, Images and Photos

    Is that your attempt at homemade lump?
  • Chris_WangChris_Wang Posts: 1,254
    edited January 2014
    My first pizza was pulled way too early and cornmeal was everywhere. Fortunately it was just for me and Meredith. We still ate the edges (my wife is a really good sport).

    Ball Ground, GA

    ATL Sports Homer


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