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Please I beg you make me laugh.. daughters 8th birthday party sleep over. Yikes

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ryantt
ryantt Posts: 2,532
edited March 2017 in Off Topic
well the title says it all, got 9 girls yikes over for the night.   I need some comic relief and something g to help me keep from loosing my mind........
XL BGE, KJ classic, Joe Jr, UDS x2 


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  • ryantt
    ryantt Posts: 2,532
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    Honestly the are driving me nuts, I don't know if I'll make it!  I may have to check into a hotel, or call one of my partners and offer to take his call tonight.   
    XL BGE, KJ classic, Joe Jr, UDS x2 


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  • Legume
    Legume Posts: 14,618
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    Drinking yet?
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  • Hntnhrd
    Hntnhrd Posts: 713
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    Take me out and put em to work!!
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  • DaveRichardson
    DaveRichardson Posts: 2,324
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    Ha!  You got suckered!!!!!  We did that a few times.  I had to bust out the most epic dad voice at 2 AM and tell them to go to bed.  There wasn't enough coffee the next morning!

    LBGE #19 from North GA Eggfest, 2014

    Stockbridge, GA - just south of Atlanta where we are covered up in Zombies!  #TheWalkingDead films practically next door!

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  • ryantt
    ryantt Posts: 2,532
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    Legume said:
    Drinking yet?
    Never have, but I might start 
    XL BGE, KJ classic, Joe Jr, UDS x2 


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  • DaveRichardson
    DaveRichardson Posts: 2,324
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    Wanna laugh?  Pull up google maps, enable traffic, and look at Atlanta....  You're now laughing at our nightmare!!!!!

    LBGE #19 from North GA Eggfest, 2014

    Stockbridge, GA - just south of Atlanta where we are covered up in Zombies!  #TheWalkingDead films practically next door!

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  • JohnInCarolina
    JohnInCarolina Posts: 30,950
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    "I've made a note never to piss you two off." - Stike
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  • ryantt
    ryantt Posts: 2,532
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    @JohnInCarolina this makes me laugh.  I'm sending this out to all my friends 
    XL BGE, KJ classic, Joe Jr, UDS x2 


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  • DaveRichardson
    DaveRichardson Posts: 2,324
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    LBGE #19 from North GA Eggfest, 2014

    Stockbridge, GA - just south of Atlanta where we are covered up in Zombies!  #TheWalkingDead films practically next door!

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  • JohnInCarolina
    JohnInCarolina Posts: 30,950
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    "I've made a note never to piss you two off." - Stike
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  • WeberWho
    WeberWho Posts: 11,026
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    https://youtu.be/XSoJqdPi4Iw
    "The pig is an amazing animal. You feed a pig an apple and it makes bacon. Let's see Michael Phelps do that" - Jim Gaffigan

    Minnesota
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  • GrateEggspectations
    GrateEggspectations Posts: 9,272
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    Love typos, misprints and the like in the news. One of my faves....

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  • ryantt
    ryantt Posts: 2,532
    edited April 2017
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    Dont remebmer who posted this the other day but it makes me laugh  
    XL BGE, KJ classic, Joe Jr, UDS x2 


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  • Hntnhrd
    Hntnhrd Posts: 713
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    ryantt said:

    Dont remebmer who posted this the other day but it makes me laugh  
    "MY NAME IS HUMPTY, PRONOUNCED WITH A UMPTY.... " lol
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  • JohnInCarolina
    JohnInCarolina Posts: 30,950
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    "I've made a note never to piss you two off." - Stike
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  • tarheelmatt
    tarheelmatt Posts: 9,867
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    ------------------------------
    Thomasville, NC
    My YouTube Channel - The Hungry Hussey
    Instagram
    Facebook
    My Photography Site
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  • bhedges1987
    bhedges1987 Posts: 3,201
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    Kansas City, Missouri
    Large Egg
    Mini Egg

    "All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given to us" - Gandalf


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  • JohnInCarolina
    JohnInCarolina Posts: 30,950
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    bhedges1987 said:
    Wrong thread
    "I've made a note never to piss you two off." - Stike
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  • bhedges1987
    bhedges1987 Posts: 3,201
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    JohnInCarolina said:
    bhedges1987 said:
    Wrong thread
    This thread was supposed to make people laugh... I think this is indeed the correct thread. 

    Kansas City, Missouri
    Large Egg
    Mini Egg

    "All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given to us" - Gandalf


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  • JohnInCarolina
    JohnInCarolina Posts: 30,950
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    bhedges1987 said:
    JohnInCarolina said:
    bhedges1987 said:
    Wrong thread
    This thread was supposed to make people laugh... I think this is indeed the correct thread. 
    It's just not political.
    "I've made a note never to piss you two off." - Stike
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  • bhedges1987
    bhedges1987 Posts: 3,201
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    JohnInCarolina said:
    bhedges1987 said:
    JohnInCarolina said:
    bhedges1987 said:
    Wrong thread
    This thread was supposed to make people laugh... I think this is indeed the correct thread. 
    It's just not political.
    Ah sorry. Didn't see there was a guideline. 

    Kansas City, Missouri
    Large Egg
    Mini Egg

    "All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given to us" - Gandalf


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  • Markarm4119
    Markarm4119 Posts: 526
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    LBGE, and just enough knowledge and gadgets to be dangerous .
    Buford,Ga.
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  • Hntnhrd
    Hntnhrd Posts: 713
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  • JohnInCarolina
    JohnInCarolina Posts: 30,950
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    bhedges1987 said:
    JohnInCarolina said:
    bhedges1987 said:
    JohnInCarolina said:
    bhedges1987 said:
    Wrong thread
    This thread was supposed to make people laugh... I think this is indeed the correct thread. 
    It's just not political.
    Ah sorry. Didn't see there was a guideline. 
    No guideline.  Just use your brain.
    "I've made a note never to piss you two off." - Stike
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  • Wolfpack
    Wolfpack Posts: 3,551
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    Bourbon was invented by a man with 3 daughters. 


    Greensboro, NC
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  • Spaightlabs
    Spaightlabs Posts: 2,349
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    In Colorado you could have about 20 mg of edibles and laugh along with them.
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  • kl8ton
    kl8ton Posts: 5,429
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    An old man was asked to stop by the IRS office because he had not claimed an income or paid taxes in 15 years.  He brought his lawyer with him. 

    IRS agent inquires as to how the old man is reporting no earnings yet manages to eat,  pay bills,  etc. 

    The old man says he is a bit of a gambler and wins enough at betting to make ends meet. 

    What kind of betting? The IRS agent inquires.

    Well for example,  I'll tell someone that I can bite my own eye. 

    What?  You are on said IRS man. I will give you a thousand bucks if you can do as you say. 

    The old man takes out his glass eye and bites it,  then puts it back in his eye socket. 

    Well you got me says IRS man. 

    The old guy says he will give him a chance to win his money back.  Double or nothing.  I bet you I can bite my other eye! 

    IRS guy thinks a while.  The old guy walked in on his own and can obviously see, so the remaining eye had to be good. Ok you are on! 

    The old man takes out his teeth and uses them to bite the other eye. 

    IRS agent is visibly upset and can't believe he fell for that. Now he is out 2 thousand dollars.

    The irs agent begs the man for another chance to win his money back.  Sure thing the old guy responds. 

    I bet you I can pee in your trash can over there.  
    The IRS man asks if the trash can stays where it is?  Yes. 

    And you stay where you are? 
    Yes. 

    And you won't get a drop in my desk? 
    Not a drop. 

    Ok I don't see how it is possible.  You are on.  The old man proceeds to urinate all over the IRS agents desk.  The IRS agent is elated!  He starts jumping up and down.  YES I WIN!

    the lawyer,  silent until now,  begins to cry. 

    IRS guy asks why. 

    Lawyer explains that before they walked in, the old man bet him $20,000 that he could on your desk and you would be happy about it. 


    Large, Medium, MiniMax, & 22, and 36" Blackstone
    Grand Rapids MI
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  • lousubcap
    lousubcap Posts: 32,347
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    There was an elderly couple who in their old age noticed that they were getting a lot more forgetful, so they decided to go to the doctor. The doctor told them that they should start writing things down so they don't forget. They went home and the old lady told her husband to get her a bowl of ice cream. "You might want to write it down," she said. The husband said, "No, I can remember that you want a bowl of ice cream." She then told her husband she wanted a bowl of ice cream with whipped cream. "Write it down," she told him, and again he said, "No, no, I can remember: you want a bowl of ice cream with whipped cream." Then the old lady said she wants a bowl of ice cream with whipped cream and a cherry on top. "Write it down," she told her husband and again he said, "No, I got it. You want a bowl of ice cream with whipped cream and a cherry on top."
    So he goes to get the ice cream and spends an unusually long time in the kitchen, over 30 minutes. He comes out to his wife and hands her a plate of eggs and bacon. The old wife stares at the plate for a moment, then looks at her husband and asks, "Where's the toast?" 
    Louisville; Rolling smoke in the neighbourhood. # 38 for the win.  Life is too short for light/lite beer!  Seems I'm livin in a transitional period.
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  • ryantt
    ryantt Posts: 2,532
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    All I can say is thanks for the distractions.   I'm making it, but barely 
    XL BGE, KJ classic, Joe Jr, UDS x2 


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  • JohnInCarolina
    JohnInCarolina Posts: 30,950
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    ryantt said:
    All I can say is thanks for the distractions.   I'm making it, but barely 
    I feel your pain brother.  Have two daughters myself.
    "I've made a note never to piss you two off." - Stike
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