OT: Pork Shortage — My Conspiracy Theory

Killit_and_Grillit

So as I sit here in my bunker with a freezer full of bacon, I ponder....

1) NC is where a large portion of the pig farms are located in the US.

2) NC is projecting 40 inches of rain. 

3) The average pig is 30 inches tall. 

4) Pig farms have poo lagoons which would contaminate the water. 

5) The Chinese govt owns Smithfield, the largest producer of pork. 

6) One would “assume” in a global food shortage, say an act of God like a Hurricane, the govt would ensure priority goes to feeding their people. 

A) Maybe pick up an extra shoulder at the store this weekend. B ) SWARM! C) I’m being paranoid. 

Thoughts from the brilliant minds who know more about global markets feel free to weigh in. 

northGAcock

I watched the AXS Doobie Brothers Biography. I am in a much better place than you are.

Wolfpack

I watched the one on the Allman Brothers this morning- good start to the day. 

Plus, I have two butts on egg- raining like crazy so going to be interesting. 

Botch

I don't know more about global markets but I did stay at a Holiday Inn last night.
You actually brought up some interesting points, maybe I'll pick up an extra package of bacon this afternoon.  
 
Also, pigs don't fly, but they do float, so there's that.  

DoubleEgger

Maybe some pigs evacuated. I saw this one on I-40. 

Killit_and_Grillit

@DoubleEgger That could just as easily be cause it’s gameday in Knoxville 

Killit_and_Grillit

@Botch

we’re gonna need a lot of salt for that brine. 

Botch

Not good.  

thetrim

And yet you have a freezer full?

Killit_and_Grillit

thetrim said:

And yet you have a freezer full?

@thetrim I’m not worried about me, I’m worried about y’all.  I had to reorganize that thing yesterday cause I couldn’t find a whole chicken anywhere. 

Plus side is I found some caribou steaks and some moose sausage I was saving for a breakfast fatty. So there’s that. 

johnnyp

Are you saying what I think you're saying?  That the Chinese used advanced, communist weather controlling technology to use supply and demand against us?  I knew it.

DoubleEgger

If you want pork, you better stock up. Regardless of a potential shortage, the storm will be used as a excuse to raise prices. 

Killit_and_Grillit

US Foods announced that prices will rise this week. 

@johnnyp that’s not what I’m saying at all...

(they could be listening)

DoubleEgger

Killit_and_Grillit said:

(they could be listening)

northGAcock

Man just sit back and listen.

https://youtu.be/gOqblSqx_VI

platypusrex

YukonRon

I have in the freezer:
2 butts
6 packs of BBRs
6 packs st louis ribs
5 # of sliced pork belly
God knows how much bacon
Plus protein from fish, poultry, beef, lamb and deer.

I read their book on world domination via cornering the market on pork futures. 

Bunker mentality is legit.

By God, if they go after wine or bourbon, I going all in (in a manner that would make Chuck Norris send me Christmas cards and Easter Baskets), by parachuting into Beijing to teach them, and the rest of the world, a lesson:

Nobody messes with the important stuff.

NorthPilot06

Hmm. I have stockpiles in the opposite direction @YukonRon

1voyager

@YukonRon - You are one Mean Butterbean! Maybe Bad A** would be a better description. 

Killit_and_Grillit

Haha. @YukonRon so no **** after I posted this I told my wife the exact same thing. 

Verbatim. “They f*ck with my bacon or my bourbon and it’s WW3. Not many things would convince me to rejoin and go Airborne but there are some things you don’t mess with.”

So there you go @thetrim you wanna see this leg jump out of a plane you now know the stakes. 

YukonRon

1voyager said:

@YukonRon - You are one Mean Butterbean! Maybe Bad A** would be a better description. 

Fvuck with my Bordeaux,  Bugundies, southern Rhônes, or my Basil Hayden, the gloves are on the ice. Just sayin'.

bgebrent

Check under your backseat.