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Chili cook off advice
texaswig
Posts: 2,682
My wife is a teacher and they are having a employees cook-off Friday at their school. She wants me to make a entry. I have a awesome regular style chili recipe I got from from @Hotch. But since there's not really any rules on what meat to use. I thought I would play dirty and use @EggObsessed smoked brisket chili probably for a guaranteed win because of most people have never had anything like it and flip out for it when they do. What say you my egging family?
2-XLs ,MM,blackstone,Ooni koda 16,R&V works 8.5 gallon fryer,express smoker and 40" smoking cajun
scott
Greenville Tx
scott
Greenville Tx
Comments
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Absolutely use a brisket recipe! For the win and the happy wifeSandy Springs & Dawsonville Ga
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I won last years teacher cook-off at my school with Kelly's chili. I say, go for it!Southlake, TX and Cowhouse Creek - King, TX. 2 Large, 1 Small and a lot of Eggcessories.
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I've heard it's pretty good.
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Office cook-offs are hard to gauge. Last year I took a great chili to one and lost (3rd place nonetheless) to some very bland and tasteless chilis. The "winner" tasted like hamburger in ketchup and absolutely no heat. So disappointed. At least mine had some flavor (and smoked brisket!!!).
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theyolksonyou said:I've heard it's pretty good.Sandy Springs & Dawsonville Ga
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I'm a Texas Red Chili guy to the end. If it is a no rules cook-off you will get everything from can or box chili to soups and stews. Some with noddles! I will say I've had Kelley's non traditional Brisket Chili and it is good stuff. I would follow the recipe to the letter. She has won quite often with it and so have many others.Large BGE, MiniMAX BGE, 2 Mini BGE's, R&V Fryer, 36" Blackstone Griddle, Camp Chef Dual Burner 40K BTU StoveBGE ChimineaProsper, TX
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Go for it but boil the brisket first like Travis.
Care to to share your or @Hotch recipe on my other thread?Columbia, SC --- LBGE 2011 -- MINI BGE 2013 -
Joking on the boiling of courseColumbia, SC --- LBGE 2011 -- MINI BGE 2013
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@onedbguru Totally agree with your statement. This year I entered with gimmesomeoven's chicken enchilada soup with rotisserie chicken and the home-made sauce and stock. My crock-pot was scraped dry. All of the other entries had half a pot left, yet mine didn't even place. I know it was the best!Southlake, TX and Cowhouse Creek - King, TX. 2 Large, 1 Small and a lot of Eggcessories.
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@EggObsessed brisket chili for the win!
"Social media gives legions of idiots the right to speak when they once only spoke at a bar after a glass of wine, without harming the community [...] but now they have the same right to speak as a Nobel Prize winner. It's the invasion of the idiots."
-Umberto Eco
2 Large
Peachtree Corners, GA -
Oh crap. I forgot when I had made hotch chili I used chili meat. I forgot it was a brisket also. @Chubbs here's his.2-XLs ,MM,blackstone,Ooni koda 16,R&V works 8.5 gallon fryer,express smoker and 40" smoking cajun
scott
Greenville Tx -
This is just for bragging rights? How big is the school so you'll know how many voters?Re-gasketing America one yard at a time.
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@RRP it's gotta be brought in a slow cooker. She said last year there was a about 30 cooks.2-XLs ,MM,blackstone,Ooni koda 16,R&V works 8.5 gallon fryer,express smoker and 40" smoking cajun
scott
Greenville Tx -
I think there is prizes.2-XLs ,MM,blackstone,Ooni koda 16,R&V works 8.5 gallon fryer,express smoker and 40" smoking cajun
scott
Greenville Tx -
Who is judging? You have to cater to your judges. Is it certain teachers/principal? Is it everyone there gets a vote? Sadly, the majority of people will think of something like a Homel's canned chili when they think of chili. Others foolishly think beans need to be in chili. So that is what you have to strive for. Don't go too spicy because most judges won't like it. Sometimes, a bunch of out-of- the-ordinary meats will work to make yours different than everyone else's. Chopped brisket would be a good choice.
Aledo, Texas
Large BGE
KJ Jr.
Exodus 12:9 KJV
Eat not of it raw, nor sodden at all with water, but roast with fire; his head with his legs, and with the purtenance thereof. -
texaswig said:@RRP it's gotta be brought in a slow cooker. She said last year there was a about 30 cooks.Re-gasketing America one yard at a time.
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Show up with your own prep table, then proceed to chop fresh herbs from your own garden. It'll psych out your competition, just ask @bgebrentSlumming it in Aiken, SC.
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chili is tough
CHILI # 1 - MIKE'S MANIAC MOBSTER MONSTER CHILI
JUDGE ONE: A little too heavy on tomato. Amusing kick.
JUDGE TWO: Nice, smooth tomato flavor. Very mild.
FRANK: Holy ****, what the hell is this stuff? You could remove dried paint from your driveway. Took me two beers to put the flames out. I hope that's the worst one. These Texans are crazy.
________________________________________________________________________
CHILI # 2 - ARTHUR'S AFTERBURNER CHILI
JUDGE ONE: Smokey, with a hint of pork. Slight Jalapeno tang.
JUDGE TWO: Exciting BBQ flavor, needs more peppers to be taken seriously.
FRANK: Keep this out of the reach of children. I'm not sure what I am supposed to taste besides pain. I had to wave off two people who wanted to give me the Heimlich maneuver. They had to rush in more beer when they saw the look on my face.
________________________________________________________________________
CHILI # 3 - FRED'S FAMOUS BURN DOWN THE BARN CHILI
JUDGE ONE: Excellent firehouse chili! Great kick. Needs more beans.
JUDGE TWO: A beanless chili, a bit salty, good use of peppers.
FRANK: Call the EPA, I've located a uranium spill. My nose feels like I have been snorting Drano. Everyone knows the routine by now get me more beer before I ignite. Barmaid pounded me on the back; now my backbone is in the front part of my chest. I'm getting ****-faced from all the beer.
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CHILI # 4 - BUBBA'S BLACK MAGIC
JUDGE ONE: Black bean chili with almost no spice. Disappointing.
JUDGE TWO: Hint of lime in the black beans. Good side dish for fish or
other mild foods, not much of a chili.
FRANK: I felt something scraping across my tongue, but was unable to taste it. Is it possible to burnout taste buds? Sally, the barmaid, was standing behind me with fresh refills; that 300 lb. **** is starting to look HOT just like this nuclear waste I'm eating. Is chili an aphrodisiac?
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CHILI # 5 - LINDA'S LEGAL LIP REMOVER
JUDGE ONE: Meaty, strong chili. Cayenne peppers freshly ground, adding considerable kick. Very Impressive!
JUDGE TWO: Chili using shredded beef, could use more tomato. Must admit the cayenne peppers make a strong statement.
FRANK: My ears are ringing, sweat is pouring off my forehead and I can no longer focus my eyes. I farted and four people behind me needed paramedics. The contestant seemed offended when I told her that her chili had given me brain damage; Sally saved my tongue from bleeding by pouring beer directly on it from a pitcher. I wonder if I'm burning my lips off? It really pisses me off that the other judges asked me to stop screaming. Screw those rednecks!
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CHILI # 6 - VERA'S VERY VEGETARIAN VARIETY
JUDGE ONE: Thin yet bold vegetarian variety chili. Good balance of spice
and peppers.
JUDGE TWO: The best yet. Aggressive use of peppers, onions, and garlic.
Superb!
FRANK: My intestines are now a straight pipe filled with gaseous, sulfuric flames. I **** on myself when I farted and I'm worried it will eat through the chair. No one seems inclined to stand behind me except that Sally. She must be kinkier than I thought. Can't feel my lips anymore. I need to wipe my ass with a snow cone!
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CHILI # 7 - SUSAN'S SCREAMING SENSATION CHILI
JUDGE ONE: A mediocre chili with too much reliance on canned peppers.
JUDGE TWO: Ho Hum, tastes as if the chef literally threw in a can of chili
peppers at the last moment. I should take note that I am worried about Judge Number 3, He appears to be in a bit of distress as he is cursing uncontrollably.
FRANK: You could put a grenade in my mouth, pull the pin, and I wouldn't feel a damn thing. I've lost sight in one eye, and the world sounds like it is made of rushing water. My shirt is covered with chili, which slid unnoticed out of my mouth. My pants are full of lava-like **** to match my damn shirt. At least during the autopsy they'll know what killed me. I've decided to stop breathing, it's too painful. Screw it, I'm not getting any
oxygen anyway. If I need air, I'll just suck it in through the 4-inch hole in my stomach.
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CHILI # 8 - Helen's Mount Saint Chili
JUDGE ONE: A perfect ending, this is a nice blend chili, safe for all, not too bold but spicy enough to declare it's existence.
JUDGE TWO: This final entry is a good, balanced chili. Neither mild nor hot. Sorry to see that most of it was lost when Judge Number 3 passed out, fell over and pulled the chili pot down on top of himself. Not sure if he's going to make it. Poor Yank, wonder how he'd have reacted to a really hot chili?
FRANK: (Not available for comment.)
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2-XLs ,MM,blackstone,Ooni koda 16,R&V works 8.5 gallon fryer,express smoker and 40" smoking cajun
scott
Greenville Tx -
theyolksonyou said:Wtf? Why won't the pic show?Which came first the chicken or the egg? I egged the chicken and then I ate his leg.
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Oddly, fresh toppings seem to be the key at these type of events(schools, offices) if allowed. I had a buddy literally heat up cans of hormel and bring chopped cilantro, cheese, tomatoes, and sour cream while everyone else brought home made chili. He won by a landslide and the comments were all about the "freshness of the chili".
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I brought Fritos to one of my co-workers' chili day on the unit. Thank God it was Neuro/Onc, because all of them stroked out after putting them on top.BrandonQuad Cities
"If yer gonna denigrate, familiarity with the subject is helpful." -
Here in the Midwest it's common to serve chili with cinnamon rolls as a side dish. It sounds strange, but the sweet compliments the heat nicely. It's all I knew growing up in Nebraska. I entered a chili cook off in Texas, during my year at nav school. Having never seen a different method, I thought it was strange that no one else had cinnamon rolls.
I got last place. The judges made sure to point out that the cinnamon rolls were "absurd". One guy (a flight instructor) said that I might as well have served it with gummy worms or a Snickers bar. He was a ****.
I still swear by chili and cinnamon rolls. However, if you're outside of the area, I recommend you go with Fritos, sour cream, cheese, onions, etc. In short, know your audience.LBGE since June 2012
Omaha, NE
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Fritos, cheese, and onions around here.
Aledo, Texas
Large BGE
KJ Jr.
Exodus 12:9 KJV
Eat not of it raw, nor sodden at all with water, but roast with fire; his head with his legs, and with the purtenance thereof. -
Putting brisket in chili changed my world over ground beef. Whatever else yo do, chunky beef is better than ground for chili. Leftover smoked brisket is perfect for chili.
The rest is taste - that takes care of your texture.
NOLA
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