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OT: Death, Taxes, and....

ZippylipZippylip Posts: 4,700
edited 7:31AM in EggHead Forum
The madam opened the brothel door to see a rather dignified, well-dressed, good looking man in his late 40's or early 50's.

"May I help you?" she asked.

"I want to see Valerie," the man replied.

"Sir, Valerie is one of our most expensive ladies. Perhaps you would prefer someone else," said the madam.

"No. I must see Valerie," was the man's reply.

Just then, Valerie appeared and announced to the man that she charged $5,000 a visit. Without hesitation, the man pulled out five thousand dollars and gave it to Valerie, and they went upstairs. After an hour, the man calmly left.

The next night, the same man appeared again, demanding to see Valerie. Valerie explained that no man had ever come back two nights in a row - too
expensive - and there were no discounts. The price was still $5,000. Again the man pulled out the money, gave it to Valerie and they went upstairs.
After an hour, he left.

The following night the man was there again. Everyone was astounded that he had come for the third consecutive night, but he paid Valerie and they went
upstairs. After their session, Valerie questioned the man. "No one has ever been with me three nights in a row. Where are you from?"

The man replied, "South Dakota."

"Really!" she said. "I have family in South Dakota."

"I know," the man said. "Your father died, and I am your sister's attorney. She asked me to give you your $15,000 inheritance."

The moral of the story is that three things in life are certain:
1. Death
2. Taxes
3. Being screwed by a lawyer :laugh: :laugh:
happy in the hut
West Chester Pennsylvania

Comments

  • bubba timbubba tim Posts: 3,216
    Zipster, you are pretty tough of your bros. Funny, but tough.. :blink:
    SEE YOU IN FLORIDA, March 14th and 15th 2014 http://www.sunshinestateeggfest.com You must master temp, smoke, and time to achive moisture, taste, and texture! Visit www.bubbatim.com for BRISKET HELP
  • NICE! :laugh:
    I'm ashamed of what I did for a Klondike Bar.
  • ZippylipZippylip Posts: 4,700
    I thought this one would bring you out'a hibernation ;)
    happy in the hut
    West Chester Pennsylvania
  • bubba timbubba tim Posts: 3,216
    nope, my designation after my name is not esq. :blink:
    SEE YOU IN FLORIDA, March 14th and 15th 2014 http://www.sunshinestateeggfest.com You must master temp, smoke, and time to achive moisture, taste, and texture! Visit www.bubbatim.com for BRISKET HELP
  • ZippylipZippylip Posts: 4,700
    yea, but you can identify and appreciate a good joke :silly:
    happy in the hut
    West Chester Pennsylvania
  • Speaking of Brothels..

    Two elderly gentlemen, who had been without sex for several years decided they needed to
    visit a whore house.

    When they arrived at the house,the Madame took one look at them and decided she wasn't going
    to waste any of her girls on these two old men.

    So she used "blowup" dolls instead.

    She put the dolls in each man's room and left them to their business.

    After the men were finished, they started for home and and got to talking. The first man
    said, "I think the girl I had was dead. She never moved, talked or groaned..How was it
    for you?

    The second man replied, "I think mine was a witch." The first man asked, "How's that?"

    "Well, said the second man, "When I nibbled on her breast...She farted and flew out the
    window!"

    GG
  • bubba timbubba tim Posts: 3,216
    yes I can. That is because I am dememted and have a sick sense of humor. Thats why we get along so well. :) :) :) :)
    SEE YOU IN FLORIDA, March 14th and 15th 2014 http://www.sunshinestateeggfest.com You must master temp, smoke, and time to achive moisture, taste, and texture! Visit www.bubbatim.com for BRISKET HELP
  • ZippylipZippylip Posts: 4,700
    IMG_1636.jpg
    happy in the hut
    West Chester Pennsylvania
  • bubba timbubba tim Posts: 3,216
    I was, it is now my bed time. Oily to bed, oily to rise. 4am..later bro.
    SEE YOU IN FLORIDA, March 14th and 15th 2014 http://www.sunshinestateeggfest.com You must master temp, smoke, and time to achive moisture, taste, and texture! Visit www.bubbatim.com for BRISKET HELP
  • Boss HoggBoss Hogg Posts: 1,377
    Hey Zip....check this out..

    eggfesteaglesgame011.jpg

    eggfesteaglesgame007.jpg

    I still have to fighre out the captions

    Boss
  • ZippylipZippylip Posts: 4,700
    That is great, you did it, you have just introduced the world to the ZIPSTER in Pictures, what do you mean by the captions?
    happy in the hut
    West Chester Pennsylvania
  • Boss HoggBoss Hogg Posts: 1,377
    In between the pics people are able to put a caption. If I know how to do it, I could have told the world which one was the Zippylip!
  • Boss HoggBoss Hogg Posts: 1,377
    Do I just type it in between the pasted Files?
  • ZippylipZippylip Posts: 4,700
    Just type anything you want in the box, then hit enter to start a new line & paste any picture you want, & if you want more words betwen pix, just keep starting new lines in the box & type whatever you want, start another new line & paste the next picture repeating as many times as you want
    happy in the hut
    West Chester Pennsylvania
  • FlaPoolmanFlaPoolman Posts: 11,675
    Yes
  • ZippylipZippylip Posts: 4,700
    yea, he put it a lot easier
    happy in the hut
    West Chester Pennsylvania
  • Kent,

    That's a version of an old Billy Connoly joke.


    Steve

    Steve 

    Caledon, ON

     

  • eggfesteaglesgame0111-1.jpg

    and the below is called Porkgasm , pork tenderloin wrapped in sausage wrapped in bacon..

    theggfesteaglesgame0071.jpg
  • ZippylipZippylip Posts: 4,700
    Bill, that's JW to my right, above the porkgasm, correct or no?
    happy in the hut
    West Chester Pennsylvania
  • correct.... and he can cook on the egg..as you know ..
  • ZippylipZippylip Posts: 4,700
    indeed, a rather humbling experience to watch him in action
    happy in the hut
    West Chester Pennsylvania
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