What? Me screw up?

Cymbaline65

A thread was started a while time ago asking folks to chime in with the best and/or most recent fail. Alcohol was normally involved. Some of these fails were absolutely hilarious so I thought it was time to start a new thread on the same theme.

My most recent was a dinner SWMBO and I were hosting. Close friends attending. Rumaki was on the Egg and pitchers of home made Margaritas were on tap (none of this nasty mixer stuff). Well, after the first pitcher was drained, one friend asks, "so any apps before the main course." I open the Egg and my Rumaki were burnt sugar and bacon-coated golf balls because I lost track of time. No pics and I held my head in shame. Second pitcher healed the wounds until the main course..

lilwooty

My biggest fail was burnt pizza crust.  Got to gabbing with our guests and the pizza stone got way too hot.  Tried to cool it down unsuccessfully.  Pizza burned within 3 minutes or so. Finally cranked out some halfway decent ones later on after everyone was half starved.  Quite embarrassing to say the least.

Mickey

Adult beverage and a nap was involved. Wings

lilwooty

Mickey said:

Adult beverage and a nap was involved. Wings

They are almost ready...say another 5 minutes or so.

GalanteNate_OneEa

@Mickey‌ Salmonella is estimated to cause 450 deaths in the U.S. every year. I commend you on your steps taken to protect your family and loved ones!

Cymbaline65

That's a classic, @Mickey.

johnkitchens

@Mickey. My wife likes her chicken crispy, but that might be a little overdone even for her! 

SJ21XDC

Mickey said:

Adult beverage and a nap was involved. Wings

Were they still moist inside ? )

JRWhitee

Mickey seems to win this type of thread every single time.  )

cook861

Nothing to say But WOW

DaveRichardson

Recently made bacon-wrapped tater tots for the kids- one of their favorite treats... Decided to cook the rest of the bacon immediately after dinner.

Forgot that I had removed my pizza stone/ plate setter and went from indirect to direct.... Needless to say the bacon was completely obliterated in less than 3 minutes. SWMBO was getting excited for good bacon for BLT's.... Walk of shame into the house with completely destroyed plate of burnt bacon nubs.

Botch

No pics of my worst fail, but you can imagine...

 

I use a wooden peel to put a pizza on my Egg, and a metal peel to remove it.  Normally I bring my cutting board outside along with the metal peel, and slide the pie onto it before bringing it in.  One time I forgot the wood cutting board, and I carefully carried the pie into my kitchen on the metal peel.

 

Not carefully enough.  I'm clumsy (I AM called Botch) and just a slight bump on the door frame sent the pie to the porch floor (I really need to sweep more often) and, according to Murphy's Law, Jelly Sammich Corrolary, toppings-side down.  

 

That's highly disappointing.   

:((

Cymbaline65

Great stories everyone! I'm about to go into crazy mode tomorrow with apps, burgers, sides+my daughter's birthday party. Gaggle of teens to descent upon the casa...I may have another story to add.

ShadowNick

Cedar planked mashed potatoes.  Didn't realize putting them in the fridge for 24 hours was required for the starches to set and the potatoes to maintain their shape on on the plank, combined with a slightly tilted egg, and about half of the 4 pounds of the potatoes ended up on the charcoal. 

The rest were damn good though, and the egg got a nice clean burn that night.

henapple

@Mickey. It's not a nap. ..it's called passing out.

Cymbaline65

Did beef and turkey burgers for 20 last night. Forgot the sautéed mushrooms and bacon that I prepared earlier in the day. Found both in the microwave this morning. Margaritas were involved.

NautiRogue

My best/worst fail was in placing the EGG into my brand new table that I had built.  I was pleased with the way that the table had turned out, and I was excited to see how the EGG looked in its new throne.

I called for my husky oldest son to help me pick up the EGG and place it in the hole...  And in my haste and lack of planning, I failed to consider disassembling the BGE.  It's an XL.  I'm guessing somewhere around 200 pounds?

We got the thing up onto the edge of the table and rested it there.  Then we slid it over and carefully lowered it into the hole.  We lowered it into the hole with both our arms jammed between the table's hole and the EGG!

Uhhhh...  This was an uncomfortable and embarrassing turn of events.  So, there we stand, trying to figure things out.  Nothing to do except muscle it out.  I reached deep and tilted the EGG (unfortunately, further compressing my son's arms), enough to pull my arms out, and then tilting it back the other way to release his arms.  We both ended up with bruised arms, and I had a bruised ego.

Next time I have to place the EGG in its table, I will definitely disassemble it completely to reduce as much weight from the base as possible!

jerryb78

I think that my worst fail was on an indoor cook.  The fail actually occurred before the oven was turned on when I had the brilliant idea to buy a leg of lamb that the store had on clearance.  I hardly ever cook lamb, so this was a new experience for me.  I brought it home and opened it up and noticed a slight funk to the meat.  Without having a lot of experience with lamb, I figured that it was just a little bit of the "gamey" smell that you sometimes hear about.  I put it in the oven and as it cooked and the fat started to render/burn, the funk was magnified times about a hundred.  It went directly from the oven out to the trash with me holding my breath the whole way.  We cleared out of the house to eat dinner at a restaurant.  This wasn't so much because we didn't have anything else to eat but more because the smell was unbearable.  It took several days for it to completely clear out.

I tend not to buy discounted meat much any more.