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1:33 AM Forum Check

Spring Chicken
Spring Chicken Posts: 10,255
edited November -0001 in EggHead Forum
Its now day 2 of my new life as a Twenty-Tengenerian. Never thought I would last this long on this planet, much less in the same body. All previous lives dating back to ‘pre-war’ days have been full of eager anticipation as to what I might accomplish when the sun came up, but two days into this one has my bones aching and my muscles barking, and any ‘eagerness’ is directed at how soon I can ‘take a load off.’ I’ve researched the problem thoroughly and concluded that I am apparently overwhelmed by the effects of gravity brought on by an abundance of me.

This is a serious problem because during my stay here I have developed a taste for a wide range of heated organic matter and I have invested quite heavily in the warming apparatus necessary to achieve the highest level of satisfaction in both the preparation of and consumption of said organics.

It would appear that I failed to take into account that the equation for calculating organic intake is not measured in how pleasurable the organic matter is but how much is needed to operate the body efficiently. It has also become increasingly clear that any exess organic intake is ‘stored’ for future use. “Future use!!!” I take that to mean that if I happen to be hopelessly stranded in a cave somewhere and decide to gnaw upon myself in order to maintain function ability I have the stored organics readily available to do so. I think not to that thought.

So what remains, according to experts in this area, is to retard my intake of organics while dramatically increasing the wear and tear on this body. They point out that soothing adult fluid intake should also be reduced.

The alternative??? According to those same experts, if I continue to pleasure myself in this manner my body will eventually require increasingly larger socially-acceptable outerwear and some vital internal parts will require intervention. And if that does not work I will be recycled according to local standards and practices at great cost to my unit.

So this day I intook less organics and no adult fluids. I would have performed some sort of strenuous wear and tear but I ached too much from thinking about it.

Apparently none of my efforts have had any impact on my need to check the plumbing, which was done without fanfare in the usual and customary manner.

While vertical I also took the liberty to check the Forum for activity. Inasmuch as there are 37 members and 323 guests on board I will take my leave and return to horizontal.

Say goodnight Leroy

Spring “Less Of Me Tomorrow” Chicken
Spring Texas USA

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