Eggcellent Hamburgers

On them. The patties were already made up. Little over 1/3 pound each. $3.98 a pound. Worth it.

Spring "Sixty Eight Years To Find The Purrrrfect Hamburger" Chicken

Got 'em at Kroger already made up and packaged. They are good that way: well packed and consistent weight. I just added what the cow couldn't.

Spring "No Use Making It Hard On Myself" Chicken

Well put Beli.

Spring "Rich Beyond My Wildest Dreams" Chicken

Open it and they shall come...

Back in another life while living in Daytona Beach, I concocted a business plan whereas I would open a "Booger's Burgers" place near the beach. And all we would serve is burgers. But every burger would be unlike anything you've ever eaten.

Being as though my motorcycle Handle was "Booger" (Pronounced "Boo-ger") the theme of the place would be motor cycles and the waitresses would be dressed like Motorcycle Mama's.

The menu would give you the following choices:

Bodacious Booger Burger - A humongous half-pounder, with a lot of stuff including garlic, onions, leaves, bushes, sauces and peppers, and rice & gravy on the side for those who want it "all the way." Served with "Grease-Pit Fries" and Alka-Seltzer. About a zillion calories.

BadAss Booger Burger - A lovely hunka dead cow, all ground and mashed into a "Cow Patty" and covered with steaming dark brown gravy and "cow pasture mushrooms" and bits of unchewed grass clippings. Served on, what else, a 'Cow Bun,' along with an assortment of sides including "Tater Trots' and "ABT's" (Atomic Buffalo Turds). This meal is intended for those whose tastes lean toward the bizarre, or who might just happen to be a wee bit drunk at the time.

Basic Booger Burger - Some dead cow, highly seasoned with local flavors and cooked to the lowest level of perfection on a hot griddle and then transferred to a smoker to try to infuse some smoke flavor similar to an old Harley oil burner. Served with our famous "Tater Trots" and blood-colored catsup. A plate is extra.

Baby Booger Burger - Any one of the above but in a smaller size. Designed for the wimps who can't handle the real stuff.

Beer and Big Orange Drink - Same Price for either (Hey... If you don't like it go somewhere else)

I would have huge animated neon sign showing a fat-belled cook with a short cigar stub in his mouth that glowed red every now and then. The cook would grab up a handful of hamburger, slap it under his arm-pit, squeeze into a patty and then slap it down on a hot griddle with steam coming up as it landed.

Naturally, we would sell T-shirts saying "I Had A Booger's Burger In Daytona Beach and Survived" or something like that.



Spring "The Original Booger" Chicken