Chicken and Falcons

Dave's Not Here · January 2003

<p />How 'bout them Birds? Both fully met expectations tonight.[p]That extra space on the grill was previously occupied by a bunch of ABTs ... momma woulda liked them.

mollyshark · January 2003

Dave's Not Here,[p]She looks pretty prim and modest like that, doncha think? Woulda thought you'd go for a looser girl![p]muuuaaahhh[p]mShark

StumpBaby · January 2003

Dave's Not Here,[p]Dat's some good looking chicken. We don't get chicken much, on accounta momma think's chicken is for layin eggs .. not for eatin. My brother and I figured a way to get momma to cook chicken when we have a hankerin for it though..you see.. momma keeps a sharpened ol chicken bone in her overalls pocket...for the express purposes of cleaning up tween her last 4 teeth (she's pretty proud of them last teeth..as..the one and only time she went to a dentist..he was a-calling all the other dentists in to see mommas teeth...said he ain't never seen something he referred to as "molahs" in the front before..they was taking pictures an everything..although we ain't never seen a camera like that before..where most people had to leave the room..and momma had to wear a smock while the picture was takin...but like magic..they did bring in some pictures a few minutes later..the dentist call it an anomoly..and we thought he was calling momma an anomoly..so we said.."her name is Annette..and don't you forget"...we're the closest to poets in my family..we used to sit up in the barn and try to make up new rhymes...we had one about momma..and she sure was mad when she heard us saying it one day..what a whoopin that was...I could't sit for a day or so..anyway...the rhyme went something like this.."Annette Annette..your pants are wet..you say it's sweat..it's pee I bet"..oh..man alive we'd laugh forever over that one...Jed made another good one too.."Betty ate the benas and the beans were loaded..Betty went to bed and the beans exploded..up with the covers ..up with the sheets...it's a fifty yard dash to the toilet seat"...man dat's a good'n..oh..them's some good memories..cept of course for the whoopin part...) ..where was I..oh..yeah that sharpened ol' chicken bone...so..when we had a hankerin for chicken..we'd wait till momma was asleep..not during the day..cause if she was asleep during the day..it's the shine what done it..not the sandman...and we couldn't get to the chicken bone if it was the shine, on accounta it usually meant momma still had them overalls on..and since she was stuffed in there like 10 pounds of sausage meat in a 5 pound casing..as poppa used to say... (once gramma took us to the city...and we saw a sign at some mercantile of a stay puff marshmallow man..it looked just like momma in her overalls..all..puffin out like you read about...we had a good laugh..grampa too..but he tol us not to mention it to nobody..when we got back..our little secret he said) we wasn't gonna get at that chicken bone..besides..when momma was out due to the shine...sometimes you wouldn't wanna get too close..on accounta your nose could be insulted a bit..I always wondered if the shine smelled so bad..why would you wanna drink it..but I suppose if'n you want an afternoon nap..really bad.like momma does sometimes.it may be worth it. So, we'd have to wait for momma to be out for the night...it took us a while to get us used to plannin ahead of time..but we finally got the hang of it..the night before we wanted that chicken..we'd sneak in mommas room and steal that chicken bone from her overalls. Next morning, we'd feed her for breakfast..some real nasty knobby ol ham with her eggs...it would get stuck in her teeth..and next thing you know..momma'd be all over the place lookin for that chicken bone..and cus'n like you read about..Jed and I usually had to run outside..on accounta us laughen so much..we may just give the plan away...well..no fail...a little while later momma'd be askin us to bring in one of them older chickens..and we'd know our plan'd worked again...and that night we'd be havin chicken for dinner..and momma'd be lookin in all our plates for the perfect bone to fit between her prized "molahs". I swear one of these days she's gonna catch us..but Jed says we're already ahead..figuring how much we like chicken..the chicken we already had was worth a single whoopin..I don't know about that..but half the fun is in the risk of it all I guess..so I'm a willin..but I'm sure to blame it in Jed..if'n we're ever found out about...cause frankly he's git a much bigger behind then me..almost freaky-like poppa once said..so I'd guess he'd be better of with the whoopin than me.[p]I ain't ever gonna try to explain to momma that I cook atomic buffalo turds sometimes...some things just ain't worth the effort.[p]StumpBaby

Dave's Not Here · January 2003

MollyShark,
She was a bit decorous while getting ready for dinner, but after resting a bit, she let her skin down. And under that golden skin, she was hot, juicy, and very tasty![p]

mollyshark · January 2003

Dave's Not Here,[p]You devil![p]mShark

Grate Grills · January 2003

Dave's Not Here,
Hats off to the birds. I'm from Green Bay, the game hurt to watch (was there) but the better team that night won. We did beef tenderloins for tailgate. Just can't imagine a better machine to cook with, especially in bad weather.

Chicken and Falcons

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