what was I thinkin\'

tjv

Dropped the two butts on the xl last night around 10:30. Lunch for couple buddies at their work.

After the butts are on, the wife locks up the house and asks if she should set the house alarm. I said no, might need to get up or something with the butts. Had the window open so if the guru alarm goes off I could hear it. Early this morning I get an elbow asking, thought you had to get up and check the meat, I promptly respond, nah, I'm good. Man, what was I thinking last night....might need to get up, yah! The guru did its thing all night, not a peep. 10 hours in, butts 180 and slowly climbing.

Gonna be a good day.

t

FlaPoolman

So can I expect you about noon Tom ? :P

vidalia1

It is emabarrasing to be at work and a coworker walks by and you have drool on your shirt....ummm pulled pork... :silly: :silly:

Susan Egglaine

yew! no pics please :blink:

tjv

so, Interstate 35 to interstate 45 to interstate 10, then where....LOL.

FlaPoolman

interstate 95 to exit 183 I'll be the one sitting on the cooler at the off ramp :woohoo: :laugh:

thirdeye

I thought the story was going to end with a butt heist....

reelgem

Might be a while Pat, he's stopping in Milwaukee first.

reelgem

Tom, I am one of your buddies, right??? Those look great, I'll have all the sides ready to go at noon. :laugh:

FlaPoolman

:pinch: :pinch:

Bobby-Q

So does that mean you didn't hear the young man sneaking into your daughter's window last night?

Sorry...you know I can't resist the chance to poke fun about your daughter to you.

tjv

she just went out to a bbq party with a male classmate.....believe me when I say, bbq never came up in my short conversation with the young lad......sometimes it pays to be over 6 foot and 250 when these kids are 5'6' and 160 dripping wet. t

loco_engr

Tom: Ya might want to use this! :laugh:

APPLICATION FOR PERMISSION TO DATE MY DAUGHTER

NOTE: This application will be incomplete and rejected unless
accompanied by a complete financial statement, job history, lineage,
and current medical report from your doctor.

NAME_____________________________________ DATE OF BIRTH_____________

HEIGHT___________ WEIGHT____________ IQ__________ GPA_____________

SOCIAL SECURITY mos________________ DRIVERS LICENSE mos_______________

BOY SCOUT RANK AND BADGES____________________________________________

HOME ADDRESS_______________________ CITY/STATE___________ ZIP______

Do you have parents? ___Yes ___No
Is one male and the other female? ___Yes ___No
If No, explain:
______________________________________________________________

Number of years they have been married ______________________________

If less than your age, explain
______________________________________________________________

______________________________________________________________


ACCESSORIES SECTION:

A. Do you own or have access to a van? __Yes __No

B. A truck with oversized tires? __Yes __No

C. A waterbed? __Yes __No

D. A pickup with a mattress in the back? __Yes __No

E. A tattoo? __Yes __No

F. Do you have an earring, nose ring, __Yes __No
pierced tongue, pierced cheek or a belly button ring?

(IF YOU ANSWERED "YES" TO ANY OF THE ABOVE, DISCONTINUE APPLICATION
AND LEAVE PREMISES IMMEDIATELY. I SUGGEST RUNNING.)


ESSAY SECTION:

In 50 words or less, what does "LATE" mean to you?

______________________________________________________________

______________________________________________________________

In 50 words or less, what does "DON'T TOUCH MY DAUGHTER" mean to you?

______________________________________________________________

______________________________________________________________

In 50 words or less, what does "ABSTINENCE" mean to you?

______________________________________________________________

______________________________________________________________


REFERENCES SECTION:

Church you attend ___________________________________________________

How often you attend ________________________________________________

When would be the best time to interview your:

father? _____________

mother? _____________

pastor? _____________


SHORT-ANSWER SECTION:

Answer by filling in the blank. Please answer freely, all answers
are confidential.

A: If I were shot, the last place I would want shot would be:

______________________________________________________________

B: If I were beaten, the last bone I would want broken is my:

______________________________________________________________

C: A woman's place is in the:

______________________________________________________________

The one thing I hope this application does not ask me about is:

______________________________________________________________

E. What do you want to do IF you grow up? ___________________________

______________________________________________________________

______________________________________________________________

F. When I meet a girl, the thing I always notice about her first is:

______________________________________________________________

F. What is the current going rate of a hotel room? __________________

I SWEAR THAT ALL INFORMATION SUPPLIED ABOVE IS TRUE AND CORRECT TO
THE BEST OF MY KNOWLEDGE UNDER PENALTY OF DEATH, DISMEMBERMENT,
NATIVE AMERICAN ANT TORTURE, CRUCIFIXION, ELECTROCUTION, CHINESE
WATER TORTURE, RED HOT POKERS, AND HILLARY CLINTON KISS TORTURE.


_________________________________________________________
Applicant's Signature (that means sign your name, moron!)


_______________________________ ________________________________
Mother's Signature Father's Signature

_______________________________ ________________________________
Pastor/Priest/Rabbi State Representative/Congressman

Thank you for your interest, and it had better be genuine and
non-sexual. Please allow four to six years for processing.

You will be contacted in writing if you are approved. Please do
not try to call or write (since you probably can't, and it would
cause you injury). If your application is rejected, you will be
notified by two gentleman wearing white ties carrying violin cases.
(you might watch your back)