A cry for help

Dos Huevos

My sister in law is insisting on cooking our bird in her oven despite the fact that her husband has a Large and I have two.[p]When asked why, she says "I don't like all that smoke flavor in my turkey." [p]I reminded her that you don't have to smoke it and that I don't smoke turkey anyway. [p]the problem is that she doesn't really use or believe in a thermometer, and she judges a turkey's doneness by what it looks like. [p]Last time she cooked an oven turkey (about three weeks ago), she cooked the bird to about 205 in the breast because "the skin wasn't done yet." [p]Now, I'd much rather have my leg o lamb than any turkey period, but if we're having turkey, I'd really prefer to cook it myself over having her kill it.[p]Is there a good way to subtly convince someone to let you cook the bird so it doesn't get rurnt?

Unknown

Dos Huevos,
Just posted this earlier, it may help - [p]From Cook's Illustrated - [p]"Having prepared thousands of turkeys in the test kitchen, we too have experienced the occasional slice of pink turkey meat. First off, always rely on an instant-read thermometer to ascertain doneness when roasting poultry. In the case of turkey, look for 165 degrees in the thickest portion of the breast and 170 to 175 degrees in the thickest part of the thigh. [p]So what about the unsettling color? Just because a slice of turkey has a pinkish tint doesn't necessarily mean it is underdone. In general, the red or pink color in meat is due to the red protein pigment called myoglobin in the muscle cells that store oxygen. Because the areas that tend to get the most exercise-the legs and thighs-require more oxygen, they contain more myoglobin (and are therefore darker in color) than the breasts. When oxygen is attached to myoglobin in the cells, it is bright red. As turkey (or chicken) roasts in the oven, the oxygen attached to the myoglobin is released, and the meat becomes lighter and browner in color. However, if there are trace amounts of other gases formed in a hot oven or grill, they may react to the myoglobin to produce a pink color, even if the turkey is fully cooked. [p]When cooking turkey or other poultry, don't be afraid if you see a little bit of pink. As long as you've let your thermometer be your guide, the meat is perfectly safe to eat."[p]

Squeeze

Dos Huevos,
Cook your own at home, bring it in a ziplock and put that on your plate.....

NCque

Dos Huevos,
Egg yours anyway. Switch it out with hers when her back is turned. [p]Or, you could call the Bumpass's dogs over to take care of her turkey. (A Christmas Story)
Travis

YB

Squeeze,
I was thinking the same thing Kevin.
Larry

fishlessman

Dos Huevos,
because of my sister not liking smoke i just started cooking 2 smaller birds, one in the oven and one in the egg. found i like this setup better because the oven bird gets the stuffing. oven bird goes in first and its not done til my egged bird gets done. that one always gets overcooked and made into gumbo and pies later. tday at her house is a different story. shes a 200 degree oven overnighter with some kind of milk style liquid stuffing. she doesnt make gravy so i still get to do that, and i eat it over potatoes as i dont trust that bird. can you get a turkey breast in there next to the lamb

Chubby

Dos Huevos,[p]In a word....NO!!
She sounds determined to drive any trace of juiciness...rite out'a that Bird!![p]Maybe your Bro could kidnap the offending Female,(for a little upstairs swore') while you brown up the skin with a Mapp torch...fooling her in to thinking it's done!![p]I think deception is your only hope!!![p]Good Luck...Mr. Phelps!![p]Evans[p][p]a

dhuffjr

Chubby,
Now that is a better idea than mine of a little shopping trip initiated by Mrs Huevos ..... let the brother take a hit for the team LOL[p]

Dos Huevos

fishlessman,[p]That's a great answer. I may do that on my other large. I think my dad, the BIL, my wife, and a few others would prefer that anyway...[p]Thanks for the advice.

Dos Huevos

dhuffjr,[p]Awesome advice fellers. I like the mapp torching of her bird. [p]She still falls for the pulling off my thumb trick, so I should be able to fool her....

Chubby

dhuffjr,[p]Unless SandBagger is somewhere close...It's your Bro's
to do!![p]LMAO!![p]Evans

randomegger

Dos Huevos,
I agree with the others - deception is the key here. How about convincing her that you'd love to have a ham on T'day as well? And since the ham and the turkey won't fit in the oven at the same time, offer to cook the turkey at your place.[p]OR[p]Enlist the help of your in-laws and disconnect her oven from the gas/electric. It may seem drastic but desperate times call for desperate measures.[p]Have a great T-day.[p]RE

WessB

Dos Huevos,
Cook yours up like you normally would...take it with you and let her and everyone else make a comparison....maybe she will discover she is the ONLY one that thinks her oven bird is better...plus you get to eat the egged bird without offending her...[p]Wess

Celtic Wolf

WessB,[p] I like it.. I may have to do that to my Mother-in-law.. Nahh!! My father-in-law is armed...

Unknown

Dos Huevos,
invite me over, I'll tell her for you.
congrats on the game last Sat

badbruce

Morning Dos Huevos,
Bite the bullet. It's only 1 day a year.
I'd have more pity but I have to go to my sister-in-laws
& eat her bird instead of putting on my usual spread.
As you can tell I'm thrilled.
Cheers,
bruce

Bobby-Q

Dos Huevos,
Are you bigger than her?

Dos Huevos

TUSK,[p]Thanks for both the offer and the congrats. I was sure we didn't have enough. You guys are still suffering from the scholarship limits. Things will be MUCH better for you in the next two years...

SyraQ

Dos Huevos,[p]Tell her that one can always use extra white meat and that you are doing a turkey breast on the egg to bring along.

Dos Huevos

Bobby-Q,[p]Jesus, I hope so.[p]LOL[p]

EddieMac

I do not ALLOW anyone to screw up my Thanksgiving......And on least four occasions....I have shown up to Thanksgiving gatherings toting my own Turkey....Too bad....So sad....I ain't eatin' dead, dry turkey!!....Ain't happening.....[p]Cook you own bird...take it along with you.....and eat happy....My the Force Be With You....And throw down a couple of cold ones on the way....[p]Ed McLean
Ft. Pierce, FL

RRP

Dos Huevos,
I haven't read the other responses but I have the similiar situation even though there are only the 4 of us at Thanksgiving. For the last 5 years we both have cooked a turkey breast - her's is dried out lke eating wood (or so the sample was) and mine is a nice moist egged one. She eats on hers and her husband, my wife and I devour mine. LOL - but it works for us!

Citizen Q

Dos Huevos,
Suck it up man, if it's her house, it's her rules, she can ruin the bird any way she chooses. If the bro-in-law isn't man enough to take charge and cook it on his own Egg in his own house, then he deserves what he gets 24/7/365. You can take a 2 oz portion of the crappy thing, smile and push it under the mashed potatoes, then go home and Egg yourself a nice bird to get you through the weekend if it's so upsetting.[p]I host Thanksgiving once every 4 years, and once every 4 years I get edible meat on my plate. I don't make an issue of it, there's plenty of good food to eat, nobody is force fed anything, and nobody goes hungry. Everyone enjoys the holiday together, which is the whole point, isn't it?

Dos Huevos

Citizen Q,[p]You make some good points. Our situation is unique in that we live across the street from one another and are co-hosting. The tie-breaker IMHO is that it's being served at my table, so I should get some say. [p]Or I should just STFU and eat the lamb.[p]

Celtic Wolf

Dos Huevos,[p] Hey I live all of 40 feet from my Mother and Father in-laws house. Every year we switch the ham and turkey chores. Least your Sister in-law BAKES her turkey.. [p] This year I am eating Ham.

Photo Egg

Dos Huevos,
I say fire up the Egg and cook your bird.
Don't make a big deal about it. Just do it.
Darian

Dos Huevos

Photo Egg,[p]See...I don't have another bird, although cooking a turkey breast quietly on the side may be in order.[p]I posted this topic half as a joke, but I love that Eggers are such creative thinkers.[p]this year, I'm thankful for you guys.

EddieMac

A lot of creative ideas here....And nobody likes to step on toes....But it's kind of time to get out the 'Man Card' out...and cook your turkey to your satisfaction.....If ya gotta keep it on the down-low....so be it....But if you're like me...ya gotta have GREAT turkey on Thanksgiving...End of story.....[p]Ed McLean...eddiemac
Ft. Pierce, FL

duckegg

Dos Huevos,
Just keep quiet and eat mor pie!

Photo Egg

Dos Huevos,
It's not to late to pick up another bird or some ribs.
I agree, the Eggers on this forum are the best...
Darian

Dos Huevos

Darren, [p]That'd be freaking sweet if I showed up with a leg o lamb and half a dozen slabs of babybacks. Maybe that can be MY traditional dish. I know the girls would love it.[p]I like the way you think, PhotoEgg.