poor chubby is distraught over smokey's lump??

just got off the phone with chubby.. . .had to talk him down off the ledge (fotunately the ledge is only 6 inches off the ground, so he wouldn't have done much damage if he'd jumped but that's not the point). . .he was still distraught over those pics that smokey posted earlier today of that funky round lump ...dare i call it. ..briquettes. ..there, i said it ...OHHH, the shame. ...

you know smokey, as a member of 'the tribe', you should know better. ..you know, when moses when up on mt. sinai, god wasn't burning no stinking briquettes. . .nope, he was burning good old natural hardwood bush, yep, burning right down till it was good old harwood lump. . .and as members of the 12 tribes, its been our duty, ney, our SACRED duty to continue that tradition to this day, to burn that natural lump, as our forefathers did before us, for all those generations. . .in some parts, this could even be grounds for excommunication from the tribe for you. . .

in the meantime, i'll keep the suicide watch over chubby tonight just to make sure he doesn't do anything rash. .. . .