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OT - Any good jokes?

thetrim
thetrim Posts: 11,352
What do you see when the Pillsbury Doughboy bends over?
Doughnuts!
=======================================
XL 6/06, Mini 6/12, L 10/12, Mini #2 12/14 MiniMax 3/16 Large #2 11/20 Legacy from my FIL - RIP
Tampa Bay, FL
EIB 6 Oct 95
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Comments

  • DoubleEgger
    DoubleEgger Posts: 17,125
    Why do shepherds wear robes? 

    Because sheep can hear a zipper from a mile away. 
  • jeffwit
    jeffwit Posts: 1,348
    edited August 2017
    Let me go ahead and get all of this out of the way. 
    Trump sucks. 
    Trump's great. 
    Media sucks. 
    Media's great. 
    Rockwood sucks. 
    Rockwood's great. 
    Buttblasters suck. 
    Buttblasters are great. 
    Focker sucks. 
    Focker's great. 
    Nola sucks. 
    Nola's great. 

    Did I miss any? ;)
    Jefferson, GA
    XL BGE, MM, Things to flip meat over and stuff
    Wife, 3 kids, 5 dogs, 4 cats, 12 chickens, 2 goats, 2 pigs. 
    “Honey, we bought a farm.”
  • Eggdicted_Dawgfan
    Eggdicted_Dawgfan Posts: 1,896
    edited August 2017
    .
    Snellville, GA


  • bud812
    bud812 Posts: 1,869
    The hurt when  pee thread.

    Not to get technical, but according to chemistry alcohol is a solution...

    Large & Small BGE

    Stockton Ca.

  • nolaegghead
    nolaegghead Posts: 42,102
    jeffwit said:
    Let me go ahead and get all of this out of the way. 
    Trump sucks. 
    Trump's great. 
    Media sucks. 
    Media's great. 
    Rockwood sucks. 
    Rockwood's great. 
    Buttblasters suck. 
    Buttblasters are great. 
    Focker sucks. 
    Focker's great. 
    Nola sucks. 
    Nola's great. 

    Did I miss any? ;)
    If that's a stream of consciousness, I'm glad you finally got it right ;)
    ______________________________________________
    I love lamp..
  • DoubleEgger
    DoubleEgger Posts: 17,125
    jeffwit said:
    Let me go ahead and get all of this out of the way. 
    Trump sucks. 
    Trump's great. 
    Media sucks. 
    Media's great. 
    Rockwood sucks. 
    Rockwood's great. 
    Buttblasters suck. 
    Buttblasters are great. 
    Focker sucks. 
    Focker's great. 
    Nola sucks. 
    Nola's great. 

    Did I miss any? ;)
    Burning pee doesn't even get an honorable mention? 
  • thetrim
    thetrim Posts: 11,352
    So Thibodeaux says to Boudreaux, "I like my women like I like my coffee?  Strong and Black!"
    Boudreaux says to Thibodeaux, "That's good, I thought you were gonna say, ground up and in the freezer!"
    =======================================
    XL 6/06, Mini 6/12, L 10/12, Mini #2 12/14 MiniMax 3/16 Large #2 11/20 Legacy from my FIL - RIP
    Tampa Bay, FL
    EIB 6 Oct 95
  • DMW
    DMW Posts: 13,832
    edited August 2017
    One time, someone posted a thread on a forum, someone else suggested there were those that might want to consider suicide. On, wait, that's not a joke, it happened.
    They/Them
    Morgantown, PA

    XL BGE - S BGE - KJ Jr - HB Legacy - BS Pizza Oven - 30" Firepit - King Kooker Fryer -  PR72T - WSJ - BS 17" Griddle - XXL BGE  - BS SS36" Griddle - 2 Burner Gasser - Pellet Smoker
  • td66snrf
    td66snrf Posts: 1,821
    Did you hear the one about the 90lb weakling that went to Alaska and came back a Husky f#cker?
    XLBGE, LBGE, MBGE, SMALL, MINI, 2 Kubs, Fire Magic Gasser
  • ColtsFan
    ColtsFan Posts: 6,310
    I Got a flat tire... 

    I should have brought asparagus 
    ~ John - https://www.instagram.com/hoosier_egger
    XL BGE, LG BGE, KJ Jr, PK Original, Ardore Pizza Oven, King Disc 
    Bloomington, IN - Hoo Hoo Hoo Hoosiers!

  • What kind of cheese isn't yours?
    .
    .
    .
    .
    Naaaaacccccchoooo cheese
    Formerly of Houston, TX - Now Located in Bastrop, TX
    I work in the 'que business now (since 2017)

    6 Eggs: (1) XL, (2) Large, (1) Small, (1) Minimax & (1) Mini - Egging since 2007
    Also recently gained: (1) Gas Thing (came with the house), (1) 36" Blackstone Griddle & (1) Pitts & Spitts Pellet Smoker
  • bucky925
    bucky925 Posts: 2,029
    Why do you invite two Baptist to your cook-out?

    Be careful when following the masses. Sometimes the M is silent.

  • bucky925
    bucky925 Posts: 2,029

    bucky925 said:
    Why do you invite two Baptist to your cook-out?

    bucky925 said:
    Why do you invite two Baptist to your cook-out?

    If you only invite one he will drink all your beer. .(I'm baptist by the way}

    Be careful when following the masses. Sometimes the M is silent.

  • DoubleEgger
    DoubleEgger Posts: 17,125
    What's the difference between a Catholic and a Baptist? 

    A Catholic will speak to you in the liquor store. 
  • LDR
    LDR Posts: 414
    What do you usually find in the middle of four Methodists...
    a fifth
  • bucky925
    bucky925 Posts: 2,029
    What's the difference between a Catholic and a Baptist? 

    A Catholic will speak to you in the liquor store. 
    to expound  on this........Jews don't recognize Jesus as the son of God. prostudents  don't recognize the Pope as the leader of the Church and Baptist don't recognize each other in the liquor store. 

    Be careful when following the masses. Sometimes the M is silent.

  • jeffwit
    jeffwit Posts: 1,348
    jeffwit said:
    Let me go ahead and get all of this out of the way. 
    Trump sucks. 
    Trump's great. 
    Media sucks. 
    Media's great. 
    Rockwood sucks. 
    Rockwood's great. 
    Buttblasters suck. 
    Buttblasters are great. 
    Focker sucks. 
    Focker's great. 
    Nola sucks. 
    Nola's great. 

    Did I miss any? ;)
    Burning pee doesn't even get an honorable mention? 
    I had to quit reading that one when Ron started talking about his nethers. 
    Jefferson, GA
    XL BGE, MM, Things to flip meat over and stuff
    Wife, 3 kids, 5 dogs, 4 cats, 12 chickens, 2 goats, 2 pigs. 
    “Honey, we bought a farm.”
  • Gulfcoastguy
    Gulfcoastguy Posts: 6,286
    In 12th grade history class one day the teacher said " Remember Monday is the final exam. It counts as 50% of your grade and you get a zero if you are absent." The class clown said "Mrs. Smith what if I am suffering from complete and utter sexual exhaustion?" With out skipping a beat the teacher said "Then you will just have to write out the exam with your other hand."
  • Hub
    Hub Posts: 927
    Donald Duck walked into a convenience store and placed a tube of ChapStick on the counter.  The clerk asked "Cash or charge?".  Donald replied "Ah, just put it on my bill."
    Beautiful and lovely Villa Rica, Georgia
  • Hub
    Hub Posts: 927
    What's the difference between elephants and grapes? Elephants are gray and grapes are purple.  What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming? "Here come the elephants."  What did Jane say? "Here come the grapes." (Jane was colorblind)
    Beautiful and lovely Villa Rica, Georgia
  • bucky925 said:
    What's the difference between a Catholic and a Baptist? 

    A Catholic will speak to you in the liquor store. 
    to expound  on this........Jews don't recognize Jesus as the son of God. prostudents  don't recognize the Pope as the leader of the Church and Baptist don't recognize each other in the liquor store. 
    I have 2 kickass Baptist drinking buddies. Great dudes in a bar. 
    Keepin' It Weird in The ATX FBTX
  • CTMike
    CTMike Posts: 3,247
    My son was in 7th grade and rode a ferry back and forth to school on Fishers Island, NY. Lots of rich people with big houses over there so a lot of construction workers went back and forth on the ferry every day also. One day he came home and told my wife the following:

    "Mom, what do you get when you stand a blonde on her head?"

    "A brunette with bad breath."

    That was one of the few times my wife thought physical punishment was warranted. 
    MMBGE / Large BGE / XL BGE (Craigslist Find) / SF30x80 cabinet trailer - "Ol' Mortimer" / Outdoor kitchen in progress.  

    RECOVERING BUBBLEHEAD
    Southeastern CT. 
  • CTMike
    CTMike Posts: 3,247
    What's the difference between a garbanzo bean and a chick pea?

    I wouldn't pay to have a garbanzo bean on my face. 
    MMBGE / Large BGE / XL BGE (Craigslist Find) / SF30x80 cabinet trailer - "Ol' Mortimer" / Outdoor kitchen in progress.  

    RECOVERING BUBBLEHEAD
    Southeastern CT. 
  • Did you hear about the new pirate movie?

    It's rated "Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr".

    *crickets*
  • thetrim
    thetrim Posts: 11,352
    What did the pickle say to the cucumber?

    I'm kind of a big dill!
    =======================================
    XL 6/06, Mini 6/12, L 10/12, Mini #2 12/14 MiniMax 3/16 Large #2 11/20 Legacy from my FIL - RIP
    Tampa Bay, FL
    EIB 6 Oct 95