elf on the shelf...severely OT

For those of us with Facebook the elf post are driving me crazy. If you don't know what it is. ..give thanks.


Twas the month of December

And all through the land

Every home had an elf

Is it woman or man?


Not very attractive,

But skinny and short

With a red suit and hat

An odd kind of sort.


It's face is bright white

And that will get harped on

It's soon time to hear

From the Rev Al Sharpton

 
To the pole every night

To give santa your mark

A Small Yuletide Helper

A big Christmas narc


The elf creeps and it slithers

Around here and over there

There it is...no it's not

Now it's what ..you say where?


With a blank,void look

And a weird twisted smile

It just sits there and stares

Like a toy pedofile.


They're all over the place

At Walmart and Sam's

Their on Facebook and Pinterest

And on Instagram


And the parents, oh the parents

Set such a high bar

To out do each other

They take it too far.


So given the choice

I'd put you in the trash

So, elf on the shelf

Will you please kis..

(you can fill it in)