Thanksgiving Disasters or Near Disasters--Let the Stories Begin--Here's Mine

BrisketBob

My Egg wouldn't close.  With help from Jaman I pulled the grate, set the roast pan in the inverted place setter.  Worked out but just barely.

SGH

I don't know if this counts or not, but yesterday I did something that I haven't done in quite sometime. I got tore up from the floor up. In my drunken state I fell asleep on the crapper in mid grumpy. How is this a near disaster? I did it in the guest bathroom with a house full of guests. Somehow I was naked and left the door open as well. Luckily it was my wife who discovered me and not one of the guests. So disaster was avoided, but it was a close call. The wife was furious to say the least. Hey all ended well though. Hope everyone had a great Thanksgiving. 

northGAcock

No feast or spirits here whatsoever. Spent 4 hours in an emergency room. All is well with no serious issues......but missed the family gathering and scared hell out of the wif. Much to catch up on over the weekend.

lousubcap

@SGH- you win!

SGH

lousubcap said:

@SGH- you win!

I only win by default because it wasn't planned

bob.bud

+1 on @sgh is a winner.

@northGAcock, happy to hear it was nothing serious. Had one of those scares a few years back - turned out to be heartburn, but with family history, as soon as they heard pain in the chest, they followed protocol and kept me overnight.

As for my near disaster this Thansgiving... temp probe was reading high (>30 degrees high), almost prematurely pulled the bird. A quick check with instant read thermometer suggested otherwise and I repositioned the remote probe.

Gdfein

After a couple weeks planning for the big cook, my daughter (10) woke up sick at 2a.  What followed was a few hours of projectile vomit with me and mama taking turns with her. Well by 8a the little one was better, but then it was mine and mama's turn to pray to the porcelain God. Suffice it to say the whole house was on a diet of saltine crackers and ginger ale yesterday instead of the BGE turkey and trimmings feast we had planned. 

We we are on the mend and gong to try an abbreviated celebration today as the bird needs to be cooked. 

Dredger

Well I agree that @SGH wins hands down. Thank goodness his wife saved the day. Mine is minor, but we took our turkey out of the freezer last Friday to thaw in the garage fridge. Decided Wednesday to move to the inside fridge. It was still partially frozen! What the heck - put in the sink with cold water for awhile and checked the temp in the other fridge with a thermometer. It registered 34 degrees. We ran it up to 38 and put the turkey back in to finish. It was fine the next morning. No wonder the beer was so good from that fridge. Duh.

JRWhitee

Disaster averted! My buddy/neighbor Alan got a LBGE about 2 months ago and his wife has since taken charge. He came over yesterday just as I was putting my turkey on the Egg and said Leah (his wife) put the turkey on an hour earlier had the temp at 350 but was dropping and was at 300, she couldn't get it back up and could I come over and help. I walked over to a house full of people and there was a big sigh of relief, and somebody yelled yay JIM'S HERE. I went out to the Egg, she had the lower vent wide open and the daisy wheel off and temp was at 275. I opened the egg and looked past the platesetter and saw white ash, I pulled out the turkey and setter and the lump was almost gone but not very much ash. I said Leah, you really need to fill the lump up to top of the fire box before you start a large cook like this. She said thats all the lump I had...Alan says she has been researching this for a month learning as much as possible, I said you can learn a whole lot but if there is no gas in the car you can't go anywhere haha...So, I went home got some lump, my looftlighter and had the turkey back on and up to 375 in 15 minutes. Alan comes up and gives me a bottle of Crown Royal and said thanks Buddy you just saved Thanksgiving, I don't know what we would have done if you weren't home, I said, you could have put the turkey i the oven! LOL.

SGH

Dredger said:

Well I agree that @SGH wins hands down. 

Sister this is one victory that I'm not really proud off

Dredger

Sister this is one victory that I'm not really proud off

Small comfort, I know, but I'm sure that a lot, if not most of us have a few of those types of stories we could share, lol.

Holepuncher

Brother brought over new girl friend......ended up  being Skanksgiving!

RRP

Mine? I started a firestorm over buying a Kick Ash Basket...with my OWN money at that!!!

buzzvol

Mine seemed more intense yesterday (before I read some others)  I was doing first spatchock turkey.  First I worried about the thaw - had to put it in the water bath Wednesday night.  Then I worried about it being to big for the LBGE.  17# bird.  Then I forgot to turn the legs to the back - had it turned backwards.  I had the egg stable at 400 with the smoke chunks on for 20 min or so.  After I put on the bird, the temp dropped which I expected.  Bit then, it wouldn't come back up.  I started opening more air.  I pulled the thermometer out a little to make sure it wasn't touching the bird.  Everything seemed to be pointing to it being hotter than the dome temp reading - quickly darking skin, billowing exhaust, flare ups when open.  I turns the grate around so legs were opposite the intake.  Dome temp jumped to 450.  Worked on backing down while worrying about a burnt bird.  In the end, the neck skin, and a few small spots of skin were chard, but the meat was moist, tender, and delicious.  I love the bge.

jabam

BrisketBob said:

My Egg wouldn't close.  With help from Jaman I pulled the grate, set the roast pan in the inverted place setter.  Worked out but just barely.

Just curious, what went wrong?

BrisketBob

Since it wouldn't quite close I figured It could get it hot enough anyway  but It didn't. I tried to close the space with duct tape but it didn't work.

YukonRon

Ran out of bourbon. Never go to a liquor store drunk. I have enough now to last until Thanksgiving 2035.

JohnInCarolina

It's Thanksgiving Day.   Four generations of family are all there seated around the table, along with some friends from the neighborhood, and my students.

Overweight Grandpa Lee is getting some good-natured ribbing from Grandma Grace about his weight.  "Better hold off on the potatoes, Lee, you're gonna lose your boyish figure."  Lee stands up in front of the whole crowd, strikes a Charles Atlas muscle man pose and sucks in his gut to simulate rock-hard abs.

 Problem is, Grandpa has forgotten to wear his suspenders as he usually does, and there is nothing to keep his baggy pants from falling completely to the floor -- taking his boxer shorts along with them.  The result is, Grandpa Lee standing there in a body-builder pose naked from the waist down, in front of his wife, the kids the grandkids and their kids, who are now all staring in slack-jawed astonishment at a sight they could never have imagined being witness to, much less on Thanksgiving Day

Mosca

JohnInCarolina said:

It's Thanksgiving Day.   Four generations of family are all there seated around the table, along with some friends from the neighborhood, and my students.

Overweight Grandpa Lee is getting some good-natured ribbing from Grandma Grace about his weight.  "Better hold off on the potatoes, Lee, you're gonna lose your boyish figure."  Lee stands up in front of the whole crowd, strikes a Charles Atlas muscle man pose and sucks in his gut to simulate rock-hard abs.

 Problem is, Grandpa has forgotten to wear his suspenders as he usually does, and there is nothing to keep his baggy pants from falling completely to the floor -- taking his boxer shorts along with them.  The result is, Grandpa Lee standing there in a body-builder pose naked from the waist down, in front of his wife, the kids the grandkids and their kids, who are now all staring in slack-jawed astonishment at a sight they could never have imagined being witness to, much less on Thanksgiving Day

Some things you can't unsee.

Fred19Flintstone

@SGH - A lot of folks write LOL when something is amusing.  Buddy, I laughed out loud!  Funny story.  Thanks.

Oh yeah, things turned out well over here.

SGH

Fred19Flintstone said:

Funny story.  Thanks.

The sad part is, the story is true. I haven't been drunk in a long time. Now I remember why I quit drinking. I always end up naked, in jail or both. My wife is still pissed. 

theyolksonyou

@sgh in my younger days I passed out in front of the toilet many times. I don't remember ever passing out on the toilet, much less mid grumpy.   In about ten years when she gets over it, I'm sure you will both laugh. 

JohnInCarolina

SGH said:

Fred19Flintstone said:

Funny story.  Thanks.

The sad part is, the story is true. I haven't been drunk in a long time. Now I remember why I quit drinking. I always end up naked, in jail or both. My wife is still pissed. 

There is no worse feeling than waking up on a cement floor and seeing bars in front of your face, my friend.

JRWhitee

@SGH I can say I don't ever remember passing out drunk on the toilet, I do remember waking up there a few times though...

BrisketBob

theyolksonyou said:

@sgh in my younger days I passed out in front of the toilet many times. I don't remember ever passing out on the toilet, much less mid grumpy.   In about ten years when she gets over it, I'm sure you will both laugh. 

Good deeds have a short shelf life, screw ups last forever especially when the little woman is concerned.Great story though. 

lousubcap

@SGH - perhaps one of those "I would have to rally to die" feelings??  The holiday season seems to more easily enable some out-of-character happenings.  Geez, just look at @JohnInCarolina's above post.  
Regardless, full props for laying it out there on the forum and enjoy your oyster feed with @nolaegghead on Sat.

Grillmagic

SGH said:

I don't know if this counts or not, but yesterday I did something that I haven't done in quite sometime. I got tore up from the floor up. In my drunken state I fell asleep on the crapper in mid grumpy. How is this a near disaster? I did it in the guest bathroom with a house full of guests. Somehow I was naked and left the door open as well. Luckily it was my wife who discovered me and not one of the guests. So disaster was avoided, but it was a close call. The wife was furious to say the least. Hey all ended well though. Hope everyone had a great Thanksgiving. 

Here is a bathroom story from last week, I typically close the door when I am on the crapper but the inflight movie had just started and I didn't want to miss the opening scenes. Not as funny as your story but...

Davec433

@JohnInCarolina Hillarious! I'm sure he'll be pretty embarrassed at family get together a from now on.

@RRP SWIMBO and I get in the same arguments all the time. Funny I didn't freak out when she traded in the Dyson and a thousand dollars for some garbage Kirby.

Mines not nearly as bad as everyone else's but as I went to lift the Turkey out to pour the juices it slipped out of my hand and bounced around on the kitchen island stopping inches before going over and crashing to the floor.

RRP

Davec433 said:

@RRP SWIMBO and I get in the same arguments all the time. Funny I didn't freak out when she traded in the Dyson and a thousand dollars for some garbage Kirby.

Obviously you didn't read the thread I started last night. This firestorm was not with my wife!

DoubleEgger

northGAcock said:

No feast or spirits here whatsoever. Spent 4 hours in an emergency room. All is well with no serious issues......but missed the family gathering and scared hell out of the wif. Much to catch up on over the weekend.

I'm glad you are ok my friend. 

JRWhitee

northGAcock said:

No feast or spirits here whatsoever. Spent 4 hours in an emergency room. All is well with no serious issues......but missed the family gathering and scared hell out of the wif. Much to catch up on over the weekend.

Glad you are alright, the bright side is you didn't gain another 5lbs or so like the rest of us. Go Cocks!