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elf on the shelf...severely OT

henapplehenapple Posts: 15,650
For those of us with Facebook the elf post are driving me crazy. If you don't know what it is. ..give thanks.


Twas the month of December

And all through the land

Every home had an elf

Is it woman or man?


Not very attractive,

But skinny and short

With a red suit and hat

An odd kind of sort.


It's face is bright white

And that will get harped on

It's soon time to hear

From the Rev Al Sharpton

 
To the pole every night

To give santa your mark

A Small Yuletide Helper

A big Christmas narc


The elf creeps and it slithers

Around here and over there

There it is...no it's not

Now it's what ..you say where?


With a blank,void look

And a weird twisted smile

It just sits there and stares

Like a toy pedofile.


They're all over the place

At Walmart and Sam's

Their on Facebook and Pinterest

And on Instagram


And the parents, oh the parents

Set such a high bar

To out do each other

They take it too far.


So given the choice

I'd put you in the trash

So, elf on the shelf

Will you please kis..

(you can fill it in)
Green egg, dead animal and alcohol. The "Boro".. TN 

Comments

  • EggcelsiorEggcelsior Posts: 13,577
    My mom grabbed a more sanitized version for my girls. Pretty goofy.
  • henapplehenapple Posts: 15,650
    Sanitized?
    Green egg, dead animal and alcohol. The "Boro".. TN 
  • EggcelsiorEggcelsior Posts: 13,577
    It isn't creepy.
  • jls9595jls9595 Posts: 1,528
    LOL, It works, so sue me...image
    In Manchester, TN
    Vol For Life!
  • EggcelsiorEggcelsior Posts: 13,577
    Next time, do it old-school with cut out magazine letters like a ransom note.

    Instant lulz
  • Ragtop99Ragtop99 Posts: 1,528
    Next time, do it old-school with cut out magazine letters like a ransom note. Instant lulz
    You are confused.  That's the Poltergeist on the shelf who does that.
    Cooking on an XL and Medium in Bethesda, MD.
  • jls9595jls9595 Posts: 1,528
    Next time, do it old-school with cut out magazine letters like a ransom note. Instant lulz
    If I was in charge that would have been done already.  Wife has full control, so it was a "nice" letter. :))
    In Manchester, TN
    Vol For Life!
  • dlk7dlk7 Posts: 1,049
    Because of that little Narc I got charcoal for Christmas last year.  I was even naughtier this year!!!

    Two XL BGEs - So Happy!!!!

    Waunakee, WI

  • bud812bud812 Posts: 1,770
    dlk7 said:
    Because of that little Narc I got charcoal for Christmas last year.  I was even naughtier this year!!!
    Ain't nothing wrong with that..

    Not to get technical, but according to chemistry alcohol is a solution...

    Large & Small BGE

    Stockton Ca.

  • henapplehenapple Posts: 15,650
    Ok...it's a joke.
    Green egg, dead animal and alcohol. The "Boro".. TN 
  • gmacgmac Posts: 1,557
    edited December 2013
    If it wasn't for the Chivas picture I wouldn't have posted this.  Well, the elf with two Barbies in the car is also interesting.  

    http://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/newfoundland-labrador/rcmp-elf-on-the-shelf-drunk-driving-campaign-goes-viral-1.2461337
    Mt Elgin Ontario - just a Large.
  • JeremiahJeremiah Posts: 4,694
    I can't resist. I found it on Facebook and sent it to my wife. Moving that dam thing is becoming straight up annoying I gotta say.
    Slumming it in Aiken, SC. 
  • henapplehenapple Posts: 15,650
    My favorite
    Green egg, dead animal and alcohol. The "Boro".. TN 
  • I agree completely. That is why my elf friend has been getting into mischief "after dark". I have several amusing pictures but this is the best (worst). Not sure why I can't get it turned right.
    image
    LBGE 2013, SBGE 2014, Mini 2015
    Columbus IN
  • JeremiahJeremiah Posts: 4,694
    Pics like these make the stupid thing worth it. Lol
    Slumming it in Aiken, SC. 
  • Seanr7Seanr7 Posts: 207
    My all time favorite.
    XL BGE
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